The more intimate your relationship becomes, whether sexually or platonically, the more important trust becomes: You grow to trust the other person more and more as you naturally reveal more and more of yourself to them. However, even in the tightest of relationships, our judgment can be confused by a variety of feelings, such as passion, love, or even an idealized conception of what a friendship or relationship should be like. Because of this, it’s important to thoroughly internalize the telltale symptoms of an unreliable individual so you can spot one in your midst, regardless of how close the two of you have grown. In this article we are going to unravel signs that you can’t trust someone.
Signs You Can’t Trust Someone
#1. They are Deceitful
Each of us has encountered a good number of people who behave in this way.
A person will be delightful as pie when they are with you. But when you’re not looking, they’ll be quick to criticize your actions and words.
They won’t be shy about spilling any tasty tidbits of information about you, either.
When you notice this kind of behavior, know that it’s one of the signs not to trust. It’s best to leave the relationship quickly for your own safety.
#2. They Ignore You in Front of Others
This kind of individual is sociable and seems to enjoy your company while you’re alone or in an unfamiliar setting.
On the other hand, they won’t even acknowledge you if you’re around their friends or individuals they’re trying to impress.
They’ll behave as if you two are new acquaintances.
They are probably attempting to gain something from you in some way if they act in this way.
Their curiosity about you is really surface-level.
They will abandon you without hesitation once they get what they want or realize that they won’t be able to acquire it.
#3. They Have Trouble Empathizing
Believe it or not, having trouble empathizing is one of the major signs you can’t trust.
For someone to intentionally lie to or harm another person, they must be incapable of feeling empathy.
It’s interesting that the majority of unreliable people lack this essential emotion.
Because they are able to experience this anguish themselves, those who have empathy would never intentionally bring harm to others.
Therefore, the capacity for empathy serves as a brake on harmful behavior.
A person lacks empathy if they are capable of breaking trust or stabbing someone in the back.
They accept no accountability for any harm, discomfort, or damage they bring to other people.
Worst of all, because they can only see things from their own self-serving perspective, those who lack empathy actually don’t even realize that they do.
However, some people have the capacity to mimic empathy under certain circumstances, typically when they stand to gain.
The attribute is hence more elusive.
Their true personality will quickly be shown by how they treat the people they contact, especially those from whom they have nothing to gain, like a waiter or a cleaning.
Lack of empathy should unquestionably be a warning sign regarding someone’s reliability.
#4. They Violate the Trust of Others
Most of us remember making a childhood promise to a close friend to keep something private, only for them to reveal it moments later.
When we make a mistake, we usually learn from it and change our methods, learning that confidentiality is sacred only when it is requested and agreed upon.
One should never put their trust in someone who enters maturity without understanding how to maintain secrets.
You can be certain that someone is unreliable if they are eager to divulge someone else’s secrets to you.
They’re intentionally breaking your trust by informing you, after all.
Your personal secrets won’t be given any more consideration.
In fact, there’s a good likelihood that this information is already widely known if you’ve disclosed it to them.
People who are unreliable love the chance to divulge delicious details that they have been given in confidence.
They do this because they think it will make them more popular and demonstrate their close relationships with others.
There is little chance of trust where there is no regard for secrecy.
#5. They Misuse Their Ability to Control You
Once someone has earned your trust and has access to some of your personal information, they may begin to use it against you.
Which you might not see as one the signs of that you cannot trust that person.
This kind of conduct frequently begins innocently enough.
They will be polite to you, but it will mostly be for show.
If you pay attention to your gut, you can sense that the connection isn’t quite right.
Your instinct will eventually turn out to be correct.
Watch how they interact with other people. Try your best to heed your gut feeling and leave before they injure you by abusing your trust.
#6. They are Overly Endearing
Meeting amiable and receptive people is typically a delight.
But that’s far different from someone who comes across as overly nice and lovely.
Despite their warmth, their actions may cause you to have intuitional suspicions.
The treacherous streak that frequently lies beneath that incredibly lovely veneer will eventually come out.
If you take a closer look at what’s happening, you’ll realize that they are continuously trying to learn more about you but never really revealing anything about themselves.
There isn’t the typical information-sharing between new friends or acquaintances.
You’ll eventually learn what their genuine intentions are, but by that time you might find it difficult to escape their grasp.
#7. They are Unpredictable
Fickleness and indecision are two very different things.
Let’s face it, most of us struggle to make decisions when faced with simple tasks like selecting an item from a menu that has too many enticing options.
Of all, from time to time, even about significant matters, we all have a tendency to change our opinions.
The difference between fickle people and others is that you can never rely on any of their decisions, regardless of how significant the issue is.
They will oscillate back and forth between a wide range of choices.
Their emotional condition might be unpredictable, and the results of their decisions often exhibit an inconsistent pattern.
Furthermore, a fickle individual will make commitments that they later backtrack on.
They are never clear about the motivations behind the choices they make because of their unpredictable emotions.
They are less inclined to follow their inner compass and are more prone to be affected by outside forces. That’s because it can’t effectively guide them as it ought to.
Volatility itself does not prove a person is untrustworthy.
#8. They Don’t Keep Their Promises
One of the most obvious signs that someone doesn’t trust your time is your tardiness.
A reliable person will go out of their way to arrive on time out of respect.
Sometimes delays are unavoidable, but when they do, the logical course of action is to make a quick contact or send a brief message.
However, it’s obvious that someone can’t be trusted to keep their promises if they frequently arrive late without making an effort to notify you that they’re running late or, worse still, don’t show up at all.
They obviously don’t appreciate the worth of other people’s time if they abruptly change or cancel plans without informing others.
They either don’t care or don’t see how their activities affect other people.
This is extremely unprofessional behavior that will erode any trust when it occurs in company.
It won’t take long for friends to realize that this individual can’t be trusted.
#9. They Exhibit Symptoms of Narcissism
A narcissist only sees the world from their own viewpoint.
They believe that they are the most important thing in the world, and that everyone else should serve them.
They are experts at playing the victim card and ensuring that others bear the brunt of errors they have committed but will never take responsibility for.
Their egotistical viewpoint dictates that someone else is always to blame.
It is simple to understand why someone who exhibits narcissistic traits is untrustworthy.
#10. They’re Telling Themselves Lies
The self-perception of an unreliable person frequently differs significantly from reality.
For instance, they can present themselves as reserved and tolerant. However, their actual actions may show that they are combative and loud-mouthed.
They are obviously attempting to shape perception to fit their needs for complicated reasons that only they understand. But it has nothing to do with reality.
Their words and actions frequently conflict to a significant degree.
Such a discrepancy ought to raise serious red flags regarding their reliability.
Of course, a lot of us occasionally engage in at least a couple of these behaviors. After all, we are only human. However, if a person constantly exhibits two or more symptoms, they are probably not someone you should put your trust in. The best advice is to follow your instincts because they are typically correct and are there to keep you safe.
Your gut reaction is probably true if you feel like something is odd with someone and your intuition warns you not to trust them. But remembering these “red flags” of unreliability may provide you with the essential support for your intuition and shield you from harm.
Signs you Cant Trust Someone FAQs
How do you know if you can't trust someone?
It will be challenging to put your trust in someone if they don’t express regret or accept responsibility for wrongdoing. Typically, this manifests as a person who must always be right or who perpetually plays the victim.
How do you trust an untrustworthy person?
Empathic listening entails listening first to comprehend, then to be understood. Establish a safe environment and communicate honestly and politely. Do what you say you’re going to do when you say you’re going to do it. Create connections that are mutually beneficial and demonstrate their concern and sense of fairness.
What causes someone not to trust people?
Several things can affect one’s ability to trust others. The ability to trust others can be undermined by a variety of experiences, including those from early childhood, social interactions, adult relationships, personality traits, and mental health issues.