Have you ever wondered why a relationship that seems so perfect will one day just collapse? Of course, there are red flags in a relationship, but we are most times too blinded by love to actually see it. Red flags in relationships are those petty things your partner does that show lack of interest and respect in your relationship. A red flag is a literal warning of some danger. This particular study is to show you the signs that signify danger in your or perhaps what we call the red flags in a relationship.
What is a Red Flag?
A red flag is a warning signal that goes off when something isn’t quite right, urging you to stay away. They’ll show up in partnerships when the object of your adoration does or says something that irritates you and makes you rethink the relationship.
Red flags, according to psychologist Annette Nuez, M.S., Ph.D., “give you a weird sense that something isn’t right.” A red flag is similar to putting a mental pin in behavior you want to keep an eye on, similar to how you could “flag” something you want to come back to.
These red signals can be subtle at times, or they can be a strong indication that it’s time to flee. Depending on the intensity of the behavior and your own relationship patterns and nonnegotiables, they can range from “continue with caution” to “definitely don’t go there,” according to psychotherapist and relationship expert Ken Page, LCSW.
Red Flags In A Relationship With A Man
As a woman, there are signs you will see in your man that show he is completely not into you or into the relationship anymore. No worries, these signs can be worked on but first, let’s see them.
Some red flags in a relationship with a man can be:
#1. They Never Take No For An Answer:
A man that is no longer interested in you won’t care about your likes and dislikes. When your man begins to not want to listen to your thoughts and ideas or would always want you to agree with him irrespective of your protests, its definitely a red flag.
#2. They Always Complain:
Whether you get it right or wrong, your man is complaining. It is almost like he is nagging. Perhaps, there is someone out there who is getting it all right. He may not be cheating but someone that loves you and wants you for keeps will not be complaining at any little thing you do.
#3. They Expect More From You:
Some men take more than they give. Worse, they feel like it is an entitlement. Most women find themselves in a relationship where all they do is give while their men take. This is most definitely something to look out for before committing to someone.
#4. They See Women As Crazy Or An Object:
Why will you be with someone who sees you as a trophy or objectify you? Some men have no problem referring to women with negative terms like crazy. This kind of person nevertheless not treat you right.
#5. They Find It Difficult To Render Or Take An Apology:
A man that has a “no apologies” mentality will be unable to handle conflict or take criticism in a relationship. One of the things that keeps a relationship going is the ability to give and take apologies. A relationship where admitting to mistakes is hard can be toxic.
Red Flags In A Relationship With A Woman
Just like men, there are many of signs with a woman while in a relationship which, if not taken care of, will lead to further damage. These are some red flags:
#1. Social Media Freaks:
Our generation has been taken over by the internet. Most women like to be on social media every hour mostly because they will like to show off whatever they have. A woman who spends her time on social media always will barely give you the attention you want.
Having good things is good, wanting to have a lot of good things is very nice. But the moment you are obsessed with having them, that is where the problem starts. A woman who likes to spend all she has on things like shoes and clothes will not be able to have any savings. Such women are set to mar you while spending your hard-earned money.
#3. Many Male Friends:
If your woman is surrounded by friends that are mostly of the opposite sex, the attention you will get is lesser. Most times, they will even make a move on her by promising a better life, better than the one you have to offer. Who doesn’t want better? Too many male friends around your woman is a red flag.
#4. She Has Promiscuous Friends:
The difference between men and women is that while men make friends from all works of life, women tend to make friends based on similar lifestyles. She may be innocent but because her friends do it, it is enough to raise doubts about her. I mean, she surrounds herself with people who will not judge her when she cheats on you probably because they do the same to their men.
#5. All Men Are The Same Mentality:
A woman will have this mentality probably because she had an ugly experience in her previous relationship. She will however do everything right or wrong so as not to experience such again. This kind of woman will make your relationship very toxic.
When to address it vs. when to get out
Walk away if your gut is screaming at you that this isn’t going to work. There is no more to say. Also, don’t waste your time trying to fit a square peg into a round hole.
If you’re not sure, there are a few things to think about, according to Page, and it takes a certain amount of intelligence. “We need to improve our ability to discriminate,” he argues, “which simply means trusting ourselves.”
Do you have any awareness of your own interpersonal patterns? Both Nuez and Page agree that this is critical. Don’t expect this time to be any different if you find yourself repeating the same old behaviors and attracting the same types of people. If you’ve been harmed before, you’ll want to be aware of your own triggers. Page points out that what you may perceive as a red flag could very well be a projection.
It’s also crucial to know the difference between manageable differences and non-negotiables, according to Nuez. It can be beneficial to identify your non-negotiables as well as your “red flags.” You might be able to work through a relationship that has some small issues but satisfies all of the nonnegotiables and green lights you’re searching for. Know that you deserve everything you want and that you will never have to settle, says Nuez.
Page advises relying on your support system and speaking with friends or loved ones who you believe have a good understanding of what a healthy relationship is like. When you’ve got your blinders on, their insight might help you see things clearly, he adds.
When all of these factors are taken into account, communication becomes the most important factor. How does this person react when you express your concerns to them? Are they willing to put in the effort—and follow through? Can they effectively communicate and demonstrate emotional intelligence? If not, Nuez and Page believe the partnership will not work out.
Take note of any red flags you detect early in a relationship.
Whether you’re dealing with lying, possessiveness, or being put down, you should take the problem seriously and think about how it can influence your relationship not just now, but in the future.
When should you give up on a relationship?
Here, experts explain some of the signs that indicate it may be time to let go:
- Your needs aren’t being met. …
- You’re seeking those needs from others. …
- You’re scared to ask for more from your partner. …
- Your friends and family don’t support your relationship. …
- You feel obligated to stay with your partner.
How do know your relationship is over?
There’s No Emotional Connection
One of the key signs your relationship is ending is that you are no longer vulnerable and open with your partner. A cornerstone of happy, healthy relationships is that both partners feel comfortable being truly open to sharing thoughts and opinions with one another.
How do you know if your relationship is beyond repair?
5 Signs Your Relationship Is Beyond Repair, According to Mental Health Professionals
- You keep breaking up and getting back together. …
- You’re afraid of your significant other. …
- Your bond or feelings have dissipated. …
- Your relationship is tainted with toxicity.