We all have been victims at a point of unfaithful partners or cheating in our relationships. Trust me, I have. I know what it feels like. But the problem is that most times when our partners cheat on us, we are probably oblivious. At times, we even choose to act oblivious and hope for the best. Love is a fickle feeling? Basically, we can do anything for love. But, cheating is getting quite rampant these days with the questions like, “is the” or “is he not cheating on me?” But how can you know for sure?
IS HE CHEATING ON ME?
Generally, the definition of cheating is relative. It all depends on who you ask. Some people may not consider micro-cheating an actual, legit problem. Basically, other concepts like causal dating popularly known as FWB are not considered cheating to some. While others would consider following a new person on IG full-on cheating. Additionally, some researchers have invented different ways which in my book are subtle ways of cheating like open marriage or even a trial separation.
IS HE CHEATING ON ME TAROT
Although, tarot reading is superstitious to some. However, some people believe you can tell if your man is cheating on you through tarot cards/ readings.
IS HE CHEATING ON ME SIGNS
No matter how your man is so good at covering up, he might leave subtle signs that will help you know if he is truly cheating on you. Some signs are;
#1. LONG PERIODS OF RADIO SILENCE:
This is the 21st century, come on. Who goes an hour without their phone? Basically, let’s tell ourselves the truth, 85% of millennials are always stuck on their “digits”. If your partner doesn’t respond to your texts and calls for a long time with no good reason, it could indicate cheating especially when they are normally really responsive.
#2. THEY’RE TEXTING AND SMILING ALL THE TIME:
When you check their phone are it’s not an adorable cat or even a dog meme eliciting that pearly-white smile, then it is a sign that he is probably getting a message from someone else…who obviously isn’t you.
#3. HE ALWAYS ACCUSE YOU OF CHEATING WHEN HE GETS JITTERY OR FEELS INSECURE:
Generally, they start feeling insecure and they project this on you. Basically, in some cases, this is a clear marker that they are cheating themselves.
#4. HE IS SUDDENLY OVERPROTECTIVE:
It starts with getting a password on his phone that wasn’t there before. When he starts making a lot of excuses, you can go “Babe, I want to use your phone.” Sometimes he can go defensive or even tell you it’s out of battery. Although, it doesn’t always mean he is cheating. But when it becomes a constant system, then you need to keep your wits up.
#5. GUILTS MUCH:
Cheating affects different people in different ways. Although this may sound funny instead of his usual anger or irritation with you, he becomes oddly nice. Trust me, change is not automatic. Although, it’s possible he might have had a change of heart. But not so much, that it’s drastic.
#6. THE BATHROOM TURNS TO HIS FAVOURITE HANGOUT:
“Babe, I’m going to pee”, “I need a quick shower”, “I want to brush my teeth”, when this becomes persistent, odds are that he might be cheating on you.
#7. BIZARRE SHIFTS IN SCHEDULE:
If you want to lie to me, at least think of a good one because it’s like you’re playing on my intelligence… Not everyone is a good liar, he can just go, “Babe I have a yoga class at 8 pm”…. When this happens, he could be “flat-ass” lying to you.
#8. SLIGHT DISINTEREST IN INTIMACY
When he is a sucker for PDA and physical intimacy, then all of a sudden, he’s not too into it anymore. Girl, this is suspicious. Because, there’s always this thought, “If he’s not getting it from you, then probably someone or somewhere else”.
#9. HE SUDDENLY CAN’T HANDLE YOUR INSECURITIES:
Maybe you probably snore or you can’t cook, it hasn’t been a problem before but suddenly it is. Now, it’s way too much to handle, they just can’t deal.
#10. “PHONE CONSCIOUS MUCH?”
Although, this doesn’t always mean he is cheap to keep your wits up. When he always charges his phone in the room all of a sudden, the kitchen is the way to go. He can be quite lousy with his phone but now when a new text comes in, he’s running to take his phone… Suspicious much?
#11. HE DON’T HAVE MUCH TO SAY:
“One obvious sign is when your partner reduces emotional intimacy with you. Emotional intimacy plainly is a kind of vulnerability. When he starts withdrawing from you, he doesn’t speak much anymore… Then this is another clear sign.
#12. HE GETS EASILY UPSET OR IRRITATED:
If he is suddenly getting crazy mad at you for little things, like leaving forgetting to text them when you were out, or leaving a dish on the countertop, it might be another sign. But don’t jump to conclusions though.
When you are being stonewalled in your relationship, then you are probably cheated on. There is zero eye contact. Then, the constant ignoring, it’s like you’re chuck beef in the house. Then he’s probably cheating on you.
#14. YOU START FEELING MORE ANXIOUS AND JEALOUS:
This is an instinctive feeling we all get. That gut feeling, it’s always almost right. When your gut is telling you that he’s cheating, try and study to see if it’s right especially when you’re not the “freaking jealous” type.
#15. HE IS BECOMING MORE SECRETIVE AND UP TIGHT ABOUT HIS SPENDINGS:
Keeping you in the dark about how he spends his money when he spends means you never know where the money is going, how much money he is spending, and who he is spending it on…that way, he would not need to explain to you who or what he is spending it on.
#16. NO MORE PDA’s on SOCIAL MEDIA:
He doesn’t tag you in photos anymore. Although, it doesn’t always mean cheating. But you need to keep an eye out. When your relationship starts taking a secretive turn, that is he no longer wants other people to know the two of you are together, then he is probably cheating on you.
#17. SUPER LUX PLACRS AND COOL DATES:
Don’t get me wrong, he might just be being sweet but don’t be too oblivious though. When he starts taking you to super cool places all the time out of the blue, trust me he might just be over-compensating. When he is constantly buying you gifts or what I like to call “guilt-offering” or even taking you out to extra luxurious places. Oh, he has a heart so he’s feeling guilty for cheating on you and trying to act like he’s still madly in love with you.
#18. THEIR ATTIRE CHANGES:
He is very conscious of what he wears, although it is great to look good or need I say extra. But when he does this every time he goes out to just hang with a friend, (if he tells you that much), babe keeps your wits up. All of a sudden pay more attention to their looks. Couples tend to care less about their looks once they feel secure in their relationship, so when he is suddenly buying new clothes to dress up or taking an extra-long time just to get dressed in the morning, there might be something up girl.
#19. HE DELETES ALL YOUR PICTURES FROM HIS INSTAGRAM FEED:
Look, I’m totally here for thirst traps…you can take them whenever you want regardless of if you’re in a relationship. But when you look at most happy couples, their feed will show them together. But yours only reflects his pics alone. Then, you should be suspicious if your partner’s feed doesn’t include you, or even worse, he deleted it.
#20. YOUR TIME TOGETHER IS ALWAYS SPONTANEOUS:
One common and efficient way a cheater avoids being caught is by cutting off commitments. When he is always trying his best to avoid patterns like “date nights on Friday” is always canceled or rescheduled, well, it’s not a good sign.
#21. PRIVATE WORK RELATED CONVERSATIONS:
Don’t get me wrong, I love my privacy and I hate someone forcing me out of it when I don’t want to. But you’re in a relationship with this person so that is not entirely the case. Maybe you notice him sitting in his car on the phone and not coming into the house until he hangs up and he doesn’t even share with you. Although, this doesn’t always mean he is cheating. However, when it is consistent there might be a need for alarm.
Like I’d always say when you’re dating someone and you are not happy in that relationship, just end it instead of cheating or stonewalling because it bruises a person in more ways than one.
How do I nurse my nerves?
Well, paranoia is not always funny but instead of the hide-and-seek game, juts talk to him.
What do I do when I find out my partner's cheating?
It all depends on you though. But confronting them does the trick especially when the evidence is alarming. Just do what makes you happy basically.