WHY AM I SO UNHAPPY in Life, Relationships & Marriage (Detailed)


Do you wake up in a bad mood almost every day and wonder, “Why am I so unhappy?” You are worried and pessimistic even before you get out of bed. In your imagination, the world does not appear to be a joyful place. You may be going through some really bad things in your life, just like the rest of us.

Perhaps you’re worried about money, which is understandably stressful. You could also be having issues in one of your relationships or at work. Even if your life isn’t bad and your troubles aren’t life-threatening, it feels like a dark cloud is following you around and you can’t shake it.

Do You Ever Ask Yourself, “Why Am I So Unhappy”?

Perhaps you believe that happiness is a random and temporary emotion. Only when something truly “good” occurs in your life do you feel content. Your pleasure is entirely contingent on external events.

But, as we all know, true happiness comes from within. At least, that’s what we’ve been told. It’s difficult to think that happiness comes from within when you’re in a condition of near-constant negativity and unhappiness with life.

  • How can it come from within when you are so unhappy within?
  • How do you “make yourself” happy when you’re not?

It may be impossible to “make yourself” happy. However, you may create situations that promote pleasure while eliminating the conditions, ideas, and actions that promote melancholy and feeling wretched. Let’s take a look at these for a moment.

Why Am I So Unhappy in My Life?

If you are frequently unhappy, you may have thought patterns and living environments that contribute to your unhappy life. Here are the top reasons why you are unhappy, unsatisfied, and negative in your life.

#1. You keep grudges.

Having a grudge is like consuming poison and waiting for the other person to die. By carrying all of that negative energy, you are harming yourself.

#2. You make comparisons with others.

The majority of people engage in the internal comparison game. They usually examine only one minor aspect of that person’s life to see where they measure up.

#3. You made the decision to be happy only when all of your desires come true.

Who is happier, the person who says, “I’ll be happy when I get 100 million dollars,” or the guy who says, “I’ll be happy with a fantastic supper and time with my family?”

#4. You’re feeling lonely.

We are social beings by nature, and fostering connections is an important element of existence. Make an attempt to change your situation if you find yourself alone and depressed on a Saturday night.

#5. You prioritize materialism over anything else in life.

While money is surely a valuable asset in this world, it does not provide happiness. Consider how you would feel if tomorrow was your final day of breathing. Would you prefer to make more money or would you rather connect with people or have certain experiences?

#6. You don’t make time for the things that are important to you.

We all lose our focus from time to time. However, keeping your activities in line with your principles might help you maintain a pleasant attitude. One useful exercise is to make a list of your values and rank them in order of significance to you.

#7. You associate with unhappy individuals.

You are the sum of the five persons with whom you spend the most time. If your pals are a frequent source of negativity in your life, it may be time to surround yourself with more positive people.

#8. You haven’t found your calling.

Many people have bought into the notion that their life’s goal is to get to the weekend. It’s no surprise that there are so many unhappy clock punchers in the world!

Why Am I So Unhappy in My Relationship?

Here are some indicators of an unhappy relationship that may be causing you to feel stuck:

#1. You’re unhappy in your home life.

You will have good and bad days no matter what you do in life. Your relationship is no exception. However, no matter what is going on at home, you must feel at ease in your own home.

#2. You’re not at ease being yourself.

Remember all you learned about yourself when you first started dating? It was the way your lover made you feel when you first met that made you fall in love with him or her.

#3. You can’t seem to stop snooping.

In any partnership, mutual trust is essential. Respect is the only way to gain such trust. I can locate you online no matter how secret or protected you believe you are. The chances of you having a password that I can’t guess are slim. I could install a remote key logger on your gadget without ever touching it if we met in person.

#4. You’re terrified of making a commitment.

It will never happen if you have been dating for more than a year and are not engaged. Commitment is essential. People will come up with a million reasons why they can’t commit.

#5. You fantasize about a happier existence without your lover.

If all you can think about is a happier life without your spouse, it’s an indication that you don’t enjoy being with them and are in the wrong relationship. You’re unhappy and need to get away.

#6. You resent your lover rather than love him or her.

When a relationship begins to fail, you begin to detest your spouse for all of the qualities you once admired in him or her. From your partner’s perspective, your dissatisfaction with them is interpreted as a criticism of who they are.

#7. You run away from your emotions.

It’s fine to reflect on the past, but wishing things were the same way they were is a sign you’re not on the right track. You’re unhappy, and at the very least, you should talk about it openly. This isn’t necessarily a hint that the relationship should terminate, but it does require rekindling.

Why Am I So Unhappy in My Marriage?

According to Romanoff, the following are some of the reasons you are unhappy in your marriage:

#1. Clinging to the past

When people reminisce about the “golden days” or times in their relationship when things were easier and they weren’t so stressed, they often end up in unhappy partnerships. People cling on to these memories rather than focusing their attention on being present and resolving current difficulties.

#2. Attempting to influence one another

Partners who set out to modify each other are another key factor contributing to unhappy relationships. The other person will begin to feel obligated to justify every decision and response to their partner.

#3. Having opposing beliefs and values

Partners who do not share core values and views may have been able to manage the early phases of their relationship, but as they learn more about each other and how they operate in the world, friction will increase.

#4. Feeling restricted

Partners may feel as if they are being held back in their relationships. They may believe that they must choose between remaining in the relationship and continuing to grow and achieve their goals outside of the partnership.

Why Am I So Unhappy at Work?

So we’ve produced a handy list of all the reasons people are unhappy at work in the guide below:

#1. You despise your boss

Your employer, the one who decides your fate, has an incredible ability to irritate you. Not everyone likes their job; we all fantasize about the ideal boss who does not micromanage and is not incompetent. Nobody, not even your ideal employer, is perfect.

#2. You despise your coworkers.

In our office, we are constantly surrounded by people. If they are cliquish or we do not get along with them, the social component of work is lost. We are social beings, and being able to laugh smile, and be ourselves at work makes us considerably happier.

#3. Your job is neither enjoyable nor rewarding.

Your job will not always be fun and games, and when it no longer becomes gratifying, you will be unhappy. Humans thrive on rewards and amusement, and we enjoy competing. You will begin to enjoy going to work if you make your work environment enjoyable and fulfilling.

#4. Your demeanor.

A negative attitude at work influences how you see everything that happens to you. When you believe everyone is out to get you, a simple word from a coworker appears much snider.

#5. You are bored with your job and feel stuck in it.

Your employment isn’t going anywhere, and you feel like you’re wasting your time on this planet, completely unsatisfied. We want to feel comfortable and secure, but we also want to advance; we get tired of the same old, same old, and want new challenges and things to do. If you merely push through documents day after day, you will grow unhappy, so what can you do about it?

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#6. Appreciation is lacking.

It’s difficult to put your heart and soul into something and not be recognized for it. Understanding the true impact of the work you are doing might be beneficial. If you are passionate about your work and perceive that it is having an impact, you should not require recognition.

#7. You are being underpaid

You believe you are underpaid for the work you accomplish, which makes you unhappy because your efforts are not recognized. Furthermore, you wouldn’t feel underpaid if it was.

Why Am I So Unhappy All the Time?

Even admitting to yourself that you are constantly unhappy might be challenging. Unhappiness can take many forms, including a nagging feeling in your gut that something is wrong.

#1. You owe money.

Worrying about money may be overpowering, clouding an otherwise joyful existence with stress and despair. You feel horrible about yourself and unhappy with life when you are continually reminded that you owe money. Just starting the process of debt repayment can make you feel lighter and happier.

#2. You’re clinging to your rage.

You may have a person in your life who has wounded or offended you and you simply cannot let it go. You believe you have been wronged, disrespected, or treated unfairly. Furthermore, you are continually thinking about the person or scenario and are becoming progressively irritated by it.

#3. You’re uninterested.

You will feel bored and uninspired if you do not have something enjoyable, entertaining, or difficult going on in your life. Life will feel meaningless and flat.

#4. You despise your job.

Because we spend so many hours a day at work, if you despise your job, you will be unhappy for the most of the day. But you have the ability to change that.

#5. You dislike your physical look.

It’s not surprising that so many individuals are unhappy with their appearance in our young and beauty-obsessed world. It’s difficult to feel attractive when the bar for attractiveness has been set so high.

#6. You’re in an unhappy relationship.

Those who are in a relationship may become quite unhappy if the connection begins to deteriorate. If you’re continually asking yourself, “Why am I so unhappy in my relationship?” you can expect your life to be very dreary until you figure it out.

#7. You have a victim mindset.

You may have experienced some terrible or challenging experiences in the past that justified your feeling unhappy and melancholy.


Several causes might cause you to be unhappy in your life, relationship, and marriage with your partner, resulting in pain, conflict, negativity, and frustration. This can lead to a downward spiral in your relationship and have an impact on other areas of your life, such as your job.

If you are unhappy in your relationship, you must recognize the problems, address them with your partner, and collaborate to discover solutions. If you believe you require assistance, you might seek support from loved ones or begin seeing a therapist or couples counselor.

Frequently Asked Questions

How do I stop being so unhappy?

How to Be Less Miserable:

  • Recognize the source of your dissatisfaction.
  • Be compassionate with yourself.
  • Allow yourself to feel cheerful whenever possible.
  • Engage in pleasurable and healthy distractions.
  • Stick to your self-care routine.
  • Look for activities that are both innovative and meaningful.
  • Create divisions

What causes a person to be miserable?

People who are unhappy are frequently furious. On the outside, they may smile and laugh, but on the inside, they are filled with bitterness and unsolved insecurities. They are frequently obsessed with envy of those around them. It’s a strong feeling that develops from powerlessness and insecurity.

Is it OK to be unhappy all the time?

Everyone experiences sadness at times; it’s a natural aspect of being human. However, being sad for an extended length of time makes life difficult and is bad for your general health. Here are some symptoms that your life is being taken over by sadness: You’ve cut off contact with friends and relatives.

What causes the depression?

Depression has no single cause. It can happen for a variety of reasons and has numerous triggers. A traumatic or stressful life event, such as loss, divorce, illness, redundancy, or employment or financial difficulties, can be the reason for some people. Depression is frequently caused by a combination of factors.

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