I understand you want your ex back. But you’re also considering moving on. You know they have flaws, but your heart still encourages you to return, thinking about how good they are at times. For better or worse, you just want to be with that person again. What’s more, guess what? When we break up, more than 80% of us think of that. If you’re contemplating getting back with an ex, you’re undoubtedly worried about how things will turn out. Maybe you’ll be able to pick up right where you left off as if no time has gone — or maybe you’ll realize why you split up in the first place.
Getting Back With an Ex
When you’ve decided to reconcile with an ex, the last thing you want to do is repeat the same mistakes that led to the relationship’s demise the first time. To avoid this, make a concerted effort to rekindle the love and sentiments that were formerly shared. Here are some precautions you can take while reconciling with your ex.
#1. Take your time before reaching out
When you’re eager to rekindle your relationship with an ex, one of the last things you’ll want to hear is advice to give yourself some space before reaching out.
#2. Consider what could have happened differently.
While you are away from your ex, you should analyze the relationship, paying specific attention to items that may have been handled better or differently.
#3. Contact your ex to discuss the relationship
You’ll want to use your newfound clarity to talk honestly to your ex-spouse after taking a closer look and accepting responsibility for your involvement at the end of your relationship.
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#4. Bring up the possibility of reconciliation.
After you’ve discussed the past with your ex, you might bring up the prospect of a future with them. It is entirely up to you how you go about this and how you perceive their response.
#5. Have a trial period
Taking things slowly when it comes to getting back with your ex is usually the name of the game. If they agree to another ride on the relationship saddle, it’s probably best if they wait for a little before climbing on and galloping into the sunset.
Getting Back With an Ex After Years
What are your chances of getting back together with your ex after years? Before I go any further, you should question yourself why you want to reconcile with your ex after years apart. You must comprehend that a lot has changed and occurred throughout this period. It is reasonable to believe that both of you have dated other people.
You two haven’t spoken in a long time, and people change over time. So, what makes you believe it’s a good idea to give it another shot after all these years? You should do yourself a favor and think this through before proceeding with your plan to reconnect with your ex. In general, seven things influence your chances of winning back your ex:
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#1. The length of your relationship with your ex
The duration of your relationship with your ex is critical. According to statistics, the longer you dated your ex, the better your odds of getting your ex back. Because you two have a long history together, the foundation of your connection and bond is stronger.
#2. The reason for the breakup
If you split up with your ex due to unforeseen circumstances, such as you or your ex needing to relocate to another city. Or country, if you two believe that long-distance relationships will fail.
#3. How the relationship ended
If you and your ex had a mutual and peaceful breakup, it is conceivable that you two can reconcile. This is because you will remember all of the wonderful things you did together, which encourages couples to do it again.
#4. Were you both serious about each other?
If you’ve met each other’s families and friends and they loved your ex, and if you’ve discussed plans together. Then you have a better possibility of reaching an agreement. When you have already talked plans together, it means that your ex has already decided in their heart that you are the one for them.
#5. Is your ex dating anyone?
If your ex is dating someone new, they may not want to leave their current girlfriend for you, especially if things are going well with them. The good news is that people believe that “the grass is greener on the other side.”
#6. Is a relationship one of your ex’s top priorities?
People’s priorities change as they progress through life. Some people may want to prioritize their work or studies over their relationships for the time being. If this is the case, you’ll need to work harder to make their ex want you back in their life.
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#7. What have you been doing to get your ex back?
If you’re reading this, you’re either thinking about getting your ex back or attempting to get your ex back but it’s not going well. What you do may sometimes jeopardize your chances of getting your love.
Getting Back With an Ex After a Year
If you and your ex have been apart for more than a year, you will need a whole new method to get your ex back. A lot has most likely changed in that year, and you should consider your options with your ex before making a move. Put this expert-approved plan into action if you see a true future and are willing to work for a better round two.
#1. Take full responsibility for your role in the breakup
Do you know what went wrong? Have you changed since then? Respond to these questions for yourself. You’re probably not ready to reconcile if you’re still in the “My ex is so insane and it’s all their fault” phase.
#2. Keep in touch and apologize.
After you’ve done your introspection, see whether your ex is open to listening. And take your words seriously. You can do this regardless of who broke up with whom or whether the breakup was mutual.
#3. Choose “no contact.”
Give your ex some space after you’ve stated your point. You want them to grasp how it feels to be without you. Not to receive your ridiculous texts. not to cuddle with you You get the picture.
#4. Don’t rush into a relationship.
Don’t get back into the dating pool to make your ex jealous or to get over them. That means you should avoid the impulse to visit Petty Town, sometimes known as the sad side of social media, to annoy your ex. If your ex discovers you’re seeing someone new and determines you don’t care about them, Wilson warns that this technique could backfire.
#5. Don’t berate yourself.
After you’ve sought it out, realize that your hurt sentiments and anxieties will subside. “Many people, both men, and women suffer from severe anxiety. Even individuals who have never experienced it,” Wilson says of break-ups.
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Why Getting Back With an Ex Never Works
The fact that people are who they are is probably the most important reason why getting back with an ex never works. I’d like to be optimistic and say that people change with time and experience (which is probably true), but they stay the same. Personality, thinking/behavioral patterns, maturity, and views just do not change sufficiently or quickly enough for ex-couples to reconcile.
These things evolve and improve at a glacial pace, which is why ex-couples who remarry after only a few days, weeks, or months function similarly. Not unless their reasons for breaking up had nothing to do with who they are as people. Emotional unavailability, concerns, trust issues, a lack of commitment, or some other temporary/solvable difficulty that was preventing them from joining hands and being on the same page are examples of such things.
If the grounds for the separation were due to a personality clash, ex-couples may resolve specific issues that led to conflicts, disagreements, or disconnections, but they may not resolve the way they manage problems. Changing the way people act and react takes months and months of deliberate work. It’s arguably one of the most difficult things to alter because it demands a significant amount of self-control, effort, and dedication.
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To be honest, getting back with an ex is rarely successful due to factors other than personality conflicts. It’s the way ex-partners perceive each other and the emotions they associate with each other. Ex-couples (particularly dumpers) form bad attitudes toward their ex.
The imprint in their minds that their ex is bad for them and that they deserve better. This changes their subconscious mind in such a way that just thinking about their ex causes them to experience great disgust. They don’t even have to wait for their ex to do something unpleasant because they harbor grudges and do nothing to address them.
In all honesty, they are frequently unaware of them. They believe their ex is simply not good enough, therefore they let their negative associations ruin their chances of getting back together. When people carry grudges, they do so for a reason. They are tired of feeling unappreciated or mistreated, so they separate themselves from the person who is causing them sorrow to avoid being harmed again.
They can’t risk their ex doing what he or she has done in the past, so they remain guarded and refuse to open up to someone who might damage them. As a result, they decide to do nothing (take a passive attitude) and wait for things to conclude, even if it means giving their ex another chance.
Getting Back With an Ex-girlfriend
Is your girlfriend no longer with you? Have you tried everything to persuade her to change her mind and come up empty-handed? Don’t freak out. Right now, I’m getting to tell you how to get your ex-girlfriend back and help you turn this scenario around.
Step 1: Determine who broke up with whom.
The method we will use to make your ex desire you back will be determined by WHO instigated the split. This is to suggest that different breakup situations necessitate different strategies. So, did she leave you or did you leave her? If she ended the relationship and you back want things to return to how they were, proceed to step 2 below.
If you dumped her but later realized you made a terrible mistake and want her back, visit my post on that exact topic because all of the methods on this page show you how to get your ex back if it was the lady who broke it up.
Step 2: Discover WHY your ex-girlfriend split up with you.
Our priority is to make sure that whatever you did that made her want to be done with you is discovered RIGHT NOW. Because you have to quit doing it or else the method I’m about to disclose will not work.
She’ll most likely have given you some evasive explanation for why she ended it. Maybe she mentioned you two had “grown apart,” or maybe she merely remarked, “I just need some space.”
Whatever she said, it almost probably did not provide you with any insight into what went wrong. This is typical of the female kind, but I’m a fellow guy on your side who can tell you the truth, so here goes.
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Chances of Getting Back With an Ex
Here are the five most crucial elements that will decide your chances of getting your ex back. Determine whether your relationship is likely to be salvageable or irreparable.
#1. The period since your breakup.
While it is possible to resurrect a previously dead relationship after years apart, your best chance of getting your ex back is to do the right things at the right time within the first three months of your separation.
#2. The duration of your relationship
It’s much more probable that you’ll get them back if you’ve had a long, great relationship with them. While they may go out and rebound after your split, it will be difficult for them to equal the depth and emotional intensity that a couple with history shares.
#3. Real reasons for your breakup
It’s simpler to win back an ex who was furious about something particular and controllable than it is to win over someone who simply doesn’t want what you have to offer. What do you think of the breakup when you reflect on it? Why do YOU believe they left?
#4. The intensity of their emotions toward you.
Is your ex still mad at you for no apparent or rational reason? Good. Or… did your romance end abruptly? Would you describe your breakup as “we grew apart” or “fireworks that suddenly stopped”?
When it comes to breakups, the adage “love and hatred are two sides of the same coin” is accurate.
#5. If you are both in the same life phase.
This is EXACTLY TRUE. Timing is everything. When it comes to life plan timing, if you and your ex are on the same page, your chances of getting your ex back are considerably higher than if you’re heading down two distinct life pathways at breakneck speed.
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Getting back With an Ex Quotes
Looking for adorable quotes about getting back together with your ex? We’ve compiled the best selection of getting back together quotes, sayings, and text messages to help you rekindle your old romance.
- “The unfortunate part is that if you simply asked, I would give you another chance.”
- “The cosmos brought us back together this time, and I’m not going anywhere.”
- “If two individuals are destined to be together, they will eventually find their way back together.”
- “It’s the nicest feeling ever to be back with you after all those years away.”
- “Rather than building the perfect relationship, we waste time hunting for the perfect lover.”
- “Only in the agony of separation do we see the depths of love.” — T.S. Eliot
- “Life is a process in which people mix and match, break apart, and come back together.”
- “It takes guts to fall in love, but it takes bravery to go back to the one who broke you.”
- “True love does not imply that you will never break up; it merely implies that you will always get back together.”
- “It’s not that we’re not supposed to be together. I believe we are simply not prepared to live forever.”
- “Knowing when to go and when to return is the key to any lasting relationship.”
- “A breakup is like a mirror. It is better to let it damaged than to injure yourself attempting to repair it.”
Getting back together with an ex is always a risky step, but if you keep these suggestions in mind, stay honest and open with each other, and put in a genuine effort, you can make it work!
Frequently Asked Questions
Is getting back with an ex a good idea?
Another advantage of reconciling with an ex is that you become aware of how much has changed in the time you’ve been away. When dating someone new, you may be at a disadvantage because you are unaware of how they have evolved and changed positively over time. With an ex, you get a greater before-and-after comparison.
How common is it to get back with your ex?
According to research, 40-50 percent of people have reconnected with an ex in order to begin a new relationship. On-again, off-again partnerships had weaker relationship quality and function than never-broken couples. People frequently rekindle relationships with ex-partners due to lingering feelings.
What percentage of exes get back together?
How long does it take exes to get back together? We conducted a study on people who get their ex back and keep them, and we discovered that the majority of people who get their ex back and keep them take at least one month to reconcile. People usually reconcile after 1-6 months of breaking up.