There’s nothing like the joy and pleasure that come along with having a healthy relationship. And, there’s nothing like the confusion and frustration of having a clingy boyfriend. You love him and enjoy spending time with him, but he’s starting to become too much. How are you supposed to know if it’s time to break up?
Let’s find out…
Clingy Boyfriend Meaning
a partner that texts you anytime they can, even when you can’t. They call you strange names in an effort to appear adorable or beautiful, but it is just so annoying. They keep on flirting because they want your love. They’ll keep asking you the same questions, such as “Are you okay?” or “Do you love me?” until you reach a point where you feel trapped and unable to breathe. Even if it’s your dad talking to you, they become really irate. They strive to stay close to you at all times, and if they don’t see you, they’ll inquire about your whereabouts, your companions, and your activities.
They will also make an effort to keep you away from your friends, and they frequently make statements to that effect.
Possible Reasons Why You Are Being A Clingy Boyfriend
While you may not realize it, your clinginess is probably making her feel uncomfortable. Here are a few possible reasons why you are clingy:
Perhaps you are insecure in your relationship. This could be because you are too dependent on her and fear losing her, or because she often remains emotionally detached, which makes you feel insecure in the relationship. Either reason could make you clingy.
#2. Low self-esteem
If you suffer from low self-esteem and don’t hold yourself in high regard, you likely think your girlfriend is too good for you. This can give rise to insecurities and fears of desertion. You may then try to compensate by being overly loving and not realizing you are clingy.
Are you overly self-conscious? Do you constantly worry about how you look, how you sound, and what people might be thinking about you? These things can also make you cling to your girlfriend and feel the need to try to impress her constantly.
#4. Fear of abandonment
If you have experienced some unsuccessful relationships or abandonment in some situations in your life, you probably fear such a situation might happen again. Your fear of loss causes you to cling to your girlfriend.
You think she belongs to you, and she should spend every waking moment with you. You are jealous of every other guy in her life.
#6. Trust issues
You don’t trust your girlfriend. You want to know your girlfriend’s every move. become anxious when she is out with friends and you think she might flirt with someone.
If you have a hectic and stressful life, you are likely craving physical, mental, and emotional support. You see your girlfriend as the only person who can fill that void in your life.
#8. Childhood issues
Have you gone through some serious childhood issues related to family (parents’ divorce, sexual harassment, etc.)? These could make you cling to your girlfriend. She makes you feel safe and cared for, and you want that feeling as much as possible.
Signs of Clingy Boyfriend
How do you know if you have a clingy boyfriend?
This isn’t the sort of thing where, if you’re asking, it’s true. The signs of a clingy boyfriend are a bit more complicated than that. So, if you’re having a hard time determining if his behavior is cute or clingy, here are some signs he’s hanging on just a little too tight.
#1. He Wants to Talk to You All the Time
Basically, he’s always either texting you, snap-chatting you, commenting on your social media, or even calling you. He feels the need to stay in touch at all hours of the day. This can be sweet but also intense.
Once you’ve established that you’re in a relationship, and aren’t getting to know each other via text, talking all day is a lot. So if every time you look at your phone, there is a text from him, that is probably a sign he is clingy.
#2. Being Touchy-Feely
He always feels the need to touch you. He holds your hands when you walk and sits with you on the couch. You may not be someone who feels comfortable with public displays of emotion, but he deems it necessary to hold your hand when crossing a street.
#3. He Hates Planning Without Him
He is your boyfriend, and therefore he thinks he has the right to be included in all your plans. He hates being left out, even if you have planned an evening with your family or girlfriends.
#4. He clings to you, physically
Cuddling is sweet. Some people just love physical affection. That is all great and fine, but if you can’t sit together without him being all over you, there’s something wrong.
On top of that, his PDA with him is at an all-time high. It doesn’t even have to be inappropriate, but if he can’t let go of your hand so you can reach into your purse or answer your phone, there is a problem. This is a sign that he’s a clingy boyfriend.
#5. You Aren’t Excited to Hear From Him
Instead of blushing and falling harder for him at every compliment, you roll your eyes. You avoid using your phone, so you don’t need to be in constant contact. And you look forward to time away from him. You may feel guilty about this because he isn’t mean or cruel, but overly clingy.
But, clinginess can be just as dysfunctional and toxic as cruelty.
#5. He Freaks Out if You Don’t Respond ASAP
A guy who is confident in you and your connection will accept that you’re busy and have a life outside of him. A clingy boyfriend, however, will freak out if you aren’t in constant contact. If it’s been more than an hour or so and you haven’t responded to him, and he doubles down on texts or calls, he’s probably clingy.
He doesn’t understand that you have a life separate from your relationship with him, so he expects you to always be available to him. He may even show up unannounced when he can’t reach you.
#6. He’s Active on all of Your Social Media
He not only comments on all of your photos, but he also views and responds to all of your stories. He will inquire with you about it after he checks your accounts to find out where you are.
Additionally, he gets upset when you don’t respond to everything he posts or when you don’t share enough images of the two of you together. He wants public assurance from you as well as verbal assurance from you. He requires this to feel content. This is a sign of a clingy boyfriend if he does it.
#7. He Must be Aware of Your Location
This is a major warning sign and an indication of a clingy boyfriend. Not only does he want your attention, but he also acts as though he has a right to always know where you are and possibly even who you are with. When you text him that you’re at lunch, for instance, his first reaction is “with you?” That might be a red flag.
#8. He Disregards His Pals
Most men enjoy their alone time. He typically wants to go out with his pals, just as you need time to yourself. He enjoys sports and/or hobbies. But there is a reason why he has ceased hanging out with his pals and doing the things he enjoys.
In order for you to do the same, he is making time to always be accessible to you. On the other side, by cutting himself off from everything else, he allows you to become his entire world.
#9. He Deceives You
He is a terrific boyfriend, but if you mention that he is suffocating you, he makes it sound like you are the one who has an issue. Asking him why he doesn’t trust you or needs to talk to you constantly will only result in him coming up with more justifications.
To make himself sound like the good person and you sound like the evil guy, he will ramble in circles. This is a clear indicator of a controlling boyfriend.
#10. He’s an Aggressive Passivity
Clingy boyfriends don’t often become upset. He most likely won’t scream or shout. He wants you to think highly of him, which is his goal. Therefore, when he is upset, he gently guilts you rather than flipping out.
When angry, he won’t be blunt. When he is angry, he might put things online in the hopes that you will see them. Let’s imagine you had lunch with a male coworker. He might give you the silent treatment if he noticed that you two had both posted from the same eatery, even though he already knows.
#11. He is Envious
Being jealous is a clear indication that your guy is clinging. And he has no legitimate reason to be envious. The attention and time you provide to your family, job, and male friends, as well as your male friendships, will make a clinging partner envious.
How to Deal with a Clingy Boyfriend
Nothing is more frustrating than a guy who texts, calls, engages in excessive PDA, and, worst of all, always wants to hang out with you. Here is how to handle him:
#1. Talk About His Securities
Try to address your boyfriend’s ingrained fears that cause him to be so needy if you believe he is worth the effort. Be there for him when he needs you, and show him lots of love and gratitude. You might have just agreed to serve as his lifelong counselor, so beware.
#2. Suggest He Lay Off
Inform your guy directly that you need some space. Make it clear to him that even though you value the affection he has shown you, you still prefer to go out with your friends without him constantly joining you. Tell him how trapped you feel.
#3. Empower Him to Lead His Own Life
Encourage him to socialize with his own friends. Set up “dates” for him to go on with his male friends, or surprise him with tickets to a cricket match with his pals. If all else fails, buy him the most recent gadget that, hopefully, will be more fascinating than you!
#4. Set Limitations
He may be clingy, but that does not preclude a long-term relationship. But in order for this to work, you’ll have to convince him that his neediness is driving you away. He must respect your autonomy, your personal space, and the fact that your life does not revolve around him. Be clear from the beginning that you will not tolerate intrusions into your personal space.
#5. Determine if you are Attractive to Him
Before you attack him for being excessively needy, consider whether he truly is as needy as you believe or whether you are just being overly critical of him.
Is it because you find him so annoying that you avoid being with him? If that’s the case, treat him fairly and call it quits.
Clingy Boyfriend Psychology
Here are three strategies for controlling awful, crazy love and transforming it into a fulfilling emotion that can improve both yours and your partner’s lives:
#1. Create a Solid Foundation for Attachment
Use images to visualize yourself with your present, former, or potential future spouse in a stable relationship. Try to see the best outcomes for your romantic relationships rather than the worst ones.
#2. Use Healthy Coping Strategies to Reduce Daily Stress
You’re more prone to exploring your own anxieties when you’re feeling emotionally frazzled, which makes you more vulnerable to potential partner rejection. Building coping mechanisms that help you feel better and deal with stressful events will help you increase your resilience.
#3. Discuss with Your Partner
Talking calmly about your emotions rather than acting on them can not only make you feel that your spouse genuinely cares for you, but it will also give them a better understanding of what makes you angry. Although they may have more difficult relationships, people who are anxiously attached are just as capable of closeness as those whose attachment bases are more stable.
Clingy Boyfriend FAQs
What do you do if your boyfriend is too clingy?
How to handle an obnoxious boyfriend
- Mention his securities.
- Let him know to stop.
- Empower him to lead his own life.
- Establish boundaries.
- Check if you are attractive to him.
What are signs of a clingy boyfriend?
The following are signs of a clingy boyfriend;
- He needs constant confirmation and wants to know where you are all the time.
- He dislikes it when you interact with others without him.
- He lacks assertiveness.
- He is Extremely Envious.
- He won’t socialize on his own without you.
- He Does Not Enjoy Any Hobbies.
- He won’t give you any room.
How does a clingy boyfriend act?
“A clingy spouse would feel the need to want to spend as much time as possible together, and would likely be asking you to schedule a lot of things, and might get offended or irritated if you make arrangements with other people,