Texting many individuals during the day is as natural to most of us as brushing our teeth or preparing dinner after work. We don’t stop to consider the hundreds of small bubbles we’ve passed between loved ones over the years; we just keep adding to them, one after another. Unless we’ve got a new number, in which case the message screen will be blank. Now you must choose the appropriate good conversation topics for texting, to anyone you wish to.
The Pros and Cons of Texting
We all know that texting is the best method for easy discussions or multitasking, and experts claim that it can assist introverts to manage encounters in particular. Most of us have also experienced the drawbacks of that convenience, which Ray refers to as “misrepresentation and misunderstanding” when tone and context are lost. Consider the following example: According to a Psychology Today article, just 7% of communication occurs through the content of the message, with the rest occurring through body language, vocal tone, emphasis, and pitch.
Similarly, some interactions are better carried out over the phone or in person. Take it from LoveQuest Coaching’s relationship specialist Lisa Concepcion. “If you can’t describe something in two simple sentences, it’s too heavy a topic for text, in my opinion. Pick up the phone and speak with someone, “According to Concepcion.
In any case, when it comes to forming a new relationship—romantic or not—texting, when combined with other types of communication, maybe effective… and entertaining! It must, however, begin somewhere.
If you’ve just scored someone’s digits—whether platonic or romantic—our experts give some advice on how to start a text conversation. We also discuss what not to do when texting a new person, because we’ve all experienced the frustration of an unanswered text.
Don’t Start a Text Conversation This Way
Most specialists we spoke with agreed that difficult issues should be avoided and discussed over the phone or in person. Avoid “heavier discussions regarding your relationship status, past hurts, personal victories, arguments or misunderstandings that might easily be taken out of context,” according to Concepcion. “If you’re messaging back and forth and thinking, ‘Why aren’t we chatting on the phone?’ then this might be the time to ask if you can call,” Ray advises.
Ray continues, “You should also avoid making statements that are sexually explicit unless that is your sole purpose. To develop a friendly and engaging open communication, the first texting chat should always be lighthearted, motivating, curious, and entertaining.” Other things to keep in mind when messaging a new person? When the text discussion is over, your tone, use of emoticons, and when the text conversation is over. According to Ray, “Some people enjoy texting endlessly, and you may not have the room or time to do so. Always have a plan in place to stop your communication in a courteous manner.”
Text Conversation Starters
According to Ray, messaging a new person means keeping things light and engaging in back-and-forth conversation about similar interests, common ground, and learning about who they are. “Learning someone’s communication style takes time, so it’s best to inquire early on, ‘So are you a texter, or do you prefer to talk on the phone?’ or ‘Can you text at work, or when is the best time to text you?'” Robyn Koenig of Rare Find, a relationship specialist, says, “The key to conversation openers is to show an interest in the other person without appearing eager for attention. Maintain a light tone and demonstrate genuine interest by reaching out with queries that allow for more than one-word responses.”
Use the conversation starters listed below to jump-start your next text chat with someone new:
#1. What do you have planned this weekend?
This conversation starter accomplishes two goals: It helps you to get a sense of their interests while also allowing you to propose a meeting if their calendar permits it.
#2. How would you describe yourself in three words?
In a small number of characters, you can get a lot of information.
#3. How do you relieve stress?
Are they the kind to go to the gym every day, or do they find peace by binge-watching TV? In any case, understanding how someone unwinds is just as vital as understanding what keeps them going.
#4. What’s your sign?
True, it may come across as a corny pick-up line, but knowing their zodiac sign might provide insight into their personality. You can also look into their compatibility with your own zodiac sign.
#5. Who have you been friends with the longest, and how did you meet?
If they’re willing, this SMS conversation starter could spark a chat about their childhood, including their family, hometown, and how they got to where they are now.
#6. What was your first concert?
They might be embarrassed to reveal their previous musical tastes, but that’s part of the pleasure.
If you share a funny meme or video with someone and they don’t laugh, it could be a sign that you don’t share the same sense of humor.
#8. What did you want to be when you were younger?
Inquire further about who or what contributed to their accomplishment if they were able to realize their dream.
#9. Who’s your role model?
What qualities or accomplishments of their role model do they admire the most? Check to see if they think they have any of the same characteristics.
#10. What’s the high point of your day so far?
If they’re having a really bad day, respond with a collection of amusing gifs or a link to a stupid YouTube video.
#11. Working on anything exciting at the moment?
Don’t limit yourself to professional initiatives when answering this question. It’s conceivable they’re occupied with something creative outside of work, such as painting their bedroom or training their new dog.
#12. What do you bring with you everywhere and anywhere you go?
Are they the sentimental sort who always carries a souvenir from their youth in their pocket? Or are they more practical, preferring to keep their possessions to a minimum, such as their phone and wallet? This texting conversation starter may provide insight into what they consider to be most important.
#13. What’s the most interesting thing you’ve read recently?
Suggest some of your favorite authors if they haven’t read any decent novels recently.
#14. What makes you nervous?
Spiders, public speaking, and Zoom calls, to name a few things… Inquire about their anxiety coping techniques, regardless of their reaction (or lack thereof).
#15. What’s your pet peeve?
Is it loud gum-chewers or lousy email etiquette that irritates them? It’s always pleasant to commiserate with someone who understands life’s little annoyances.
#16. Do you have any hidden talents?
Unless you inquire, you may not learn about their photography, singing, or poker abilities.
#17. What else can you tell me about your post on [Instagram/Snapchat/Facebook/etc.]?
If you’re friends with them on social media, ask them to elaborate on one of their most recent postings. You may, for example, inquire about a delectable-looking meal they shared, or inquire as to where they were when they shared that sunset photo.
#18. What’s one thing you always do before bed?
Perhaps they meditate, listen to a podcast, or treat their skin to a facial. Continue the conversation by asking them about their favorite daily rituals.
#19. Were (or are) you a good student?
Don’t forget to inquire about their preferred and least preferred subjects. In one fell sweep, you can learn more about their work ethic and interests with this texting conversation starter.
#20. If you could outsource one thing in life, what would it be?
Is it cleaning, laundry, cooking, shopping for groceries, or something else entirely? Inquire about how they plan to utilize the extra time.
#21. If you came with a warning label, what would it say?
There’s likely to be a little truth to their reply, even if their response is in jest.
#22. How did your [interview/meeting/workout class] go?
This text conversation starter demonstrates that you were listening during a prior chat and allows you to share in their successes and disappointments.
#23. What’s your favorite food?
With this text conversation starter, get back to fundamentals. You may respond with the name of your favorite restaurant serving that food or cuisine, and invite them to join you for a low-key lunch or a more intimate evening.
#24. Can you help me choose between [X] and [Y]?
You’re demonstrating that you value their viewpoint even if you don’t actually need their help deciding what to wear tomorrow or what to eat for supper tonight.
#25. What was your first impression of me?
This text conversation starter is usually good for a laugh, as long as you’re okay with the possibility of a sarcastic response.
#26. If you could travel anywhere in the world right now, where would you go?
Is it a place they’ve been previously, or is it on their list of places to visit?
#27. What’s an emoji that sums up your day so far?
Respond with a few questions about what led to the smiley or sad expression.
#28. What’s your favorite movie?
What’s the number of times they’ve seen it? If they can tell you their favorite line from the movie, you’ll get bonus points.
#29. What’s your favorite place in your home?
Their response may reveal their introverted characteristics or reveal that they are an extrovert.
#30. Hey! Let’s get together when are you free so we can meet up?
With this SMS conversation starter, you may skip the small talk and get right to the subject. After all, even the most engrossing text chat can’t compare to the relationships that can be created during a face-to-face meeting.
Questions to ask a guy or girl over text list
If you’re having trouble coming up with questions to SMS a guy or girl, or just need some inspiration, we’ve got you covered. Take a peek around and have fun! I’m confident you’ll find at least a few of them beneficial!
#1. What’s your “go to” video or gif for a laugh?
A fantastic method to laugh out loud and have something in common to discuss now and in the future. You may also discover how similar their sense of humor is to yours. You can also share some of your favorite hilarious videos if you have any.
#2. Where’s your favorite place to get take away or delivery from?
You may brag about how great a place is if you know it and like it. Give it a try if you haven’t already, and you’ll have something to chat about the next time you text them!
#3. What song do you play most often?
It’s a great way to get to know their musical tastes and evaluate how closely they match your own. Plus, everyone is enthusiastic about the music they enjoy, so they are likely to talk about it extensively.
#4. What’s your favorite quote from a movie?
A question that screams for back-and-forth movie quotes from their favorite films and yours. Plus, it’s quite easy to get sidetracked and start chatting about their favorite movies.
#5. What’s your “go to” joke?
Everyone enjoys a good chuckle, and everyone knows at least one joke by heart. You’ll also be able to crack a few jokes with them. Try the jokes subreddit if you’re like me and can’t recall many jokes. Simply sort by the top of the page, month, or week.
#6. What song has the best intro?
Another question that works well over the phone since you can look it up on your phone and listen after they tell you. Then return to tell them what you thought of it.
#7. What is the scariest non banned item you could take on to a plane?
This is a more imaginative exercise. But it’s nice for some back-and-forth as you both come up with terrifying non-banned stuff. (e.g., a parachute, a voodoo doll dressed as a pilot, a full clown costume, etc.)
#8. What’s the (funniest / most disappointing / weirdest / etc.) text you’ve gotten?
This isn’t a good one to start with, but it’s wonderful if you’ve been texting for a while and need something to talk about.
#9. What is your favorite meme?
There is at least one meme that everyone enjoys. You can find out what theirs is, and who knows, it might be the same as yours! Memes are also a terrific way to start a conversation, which is always entertaining.
#10. How many questions can you answer in just pictures?
This is more of a game than anything else. You pose broad, general queries, and they attempt to respond just using photos. If they’re up to it, it’ll be a lot of fun. It’s a bit like going on a treasure hunt. But I wouldn’t start with this one; it’s better for later or if they’re in a playful mood.
#11. What is the most interesting thing you have on you or near you right now? Send me a pic of it.
An innovative technique to come up with a new topic to discuss. You’ll also get a sense of the kinds of things that attract them.
#13. What’s the best photo you’ve taken?
It’s time to let them strut their stuff. We’ve all shot photos that we truly enjoy. You now have the opportunity to congratulate them on their accomplishment. This is a great SMS question to ask a girl or guy.
#14. What’s the worst text that you accidentally sent?
Embarrassment is a powerful emotion, and if they’re prepared to tell a story, it’ll pull you both closer together. It’s wonderful to empathize with them, and if the situation isn’t too awful, you can engage in some lighthearted teasing.
#15. What thing do you really wish you could buy right now?
It’s great because they can email you a link to the thing they’re interested in and you can look it over. Now you have something to talk about with them that they are interested in.
#16. What’s the funniest thing that someone could spend money on / buy on the internet?
Because they can email you the URL, this question is similar to the one above, but it requires a little more imagination. This one frequently results in a hilarious flood of amusing items and services.
#17. What’s the funniest picture you have on your phone?
It’s similar to the last video question, and it’s fantastic for the same reason. It provides you and your partner with something to chat about. You might simply limit it to the funniest photo of yourself on your phone.
#18. What dumb pickup lines do you know?
Everyone has heard some ridiculous or amusing pickup lines. And this inquiry is a terrific approach to start a conversation about amusing pickup lines.
#19. What are some unwritten rules?
This one is a bit different from the others. You might go in a couple of areas with it, such as unwritten rules amongst friends or society as a whole.
But, like many of the other text questions, it’s fantastic because it’s perfect for back-and-forth texting as you both come up with new rules.
#20. What happens in real life but rarely gets portrayed in movies?
Another one that might necessitate a little ingenuity. You can simply flip the question around and ask what happens frequently in movies but rarely in real life.
#21. What isn’t real but you desperately wish it was?
It’s just a lot of fun to answer this one. Everyone enjoys daydreaming about the fantastic things they wish were real.
#22. What’s the best “hidden gem” that you’ve found?
Who doesn’t like to show off new things they’ve discovered? It could be a band, a website, or anything they purchased. You can let them know that it isn’t necessary for it to be completely unknown. It could simply be something they came across.
#23. What’s the silliest thing you are passionate about?
We all have hobbies that aren’t really productive, but they keep us sane. And it’s a terrific approach to find out what they’re actually interested in. Something they might not want the rest of the world to know about.
#24. What do you hate/love most about your phone?
I’m sure you and your phone have a love/hate relationship, and they probably do as well. It could be something more general, such as taking up too much of my time, or a specific feature, such as the fingerprint scanner.
#25. What’s the most ridiculous thing you’ve seen online recently?
This is another one that will provide you with something in common to discuss. It’s also simple for them to provide you with a link to the absurdity so you can check it out.
Conversation Starters To Ask A Girl Over Text
- What do you have planned for the weekend?
- Have you seen the most recent episode of (relevant television show)?
- What did you have for lunch today?
- What amusing event occurred in your life today? [1]
- Do you plan on attending a (party, bar, etc.) this weekend?
- Are you working on something exciting?
- What was your week’s high point?
- Are you having a good time?
- Have you ever visited (a restaurant, a store, etc.)?
- What are your plans for the new year?
- Are you planning on spending the holidays with your family?
- What is your concept of a perfect Sunday?
- Right now, where do you wish to be?
- Would you rather eat sushi or pizza at a restaurant?
When do you think I’ll be able to see you again?
Are you looking for a new challenge? - When are you available?
- What three items would you bring if you were stranded on a desert island?
FAQs
What's the 3 day rule?
A three-day rule is a dating approach that recommends calling your date three days after you’ve gone out. The theory is that waiting three days helps you appear less eager and/or desperate, and gives your date time to realize how much they enjoyed you while you’re away.
How do you get your crush to like you over text?
Simply choose one item you have in common, such as a friend or a pastime, and be sure to bring it up in your texting discussion. Sending an SMS that is a question is also a wonderful approach to start or continue the conversation.
How long should I wait to text her?
It’s probably safe to text between two and 24 hours after you’ve met, matched on Tinder, gone on a date, or even hooked up (depending on which of those scenarios applies).
