HOW TO BE INDEPENDENT: How To Become Independent In A Relationship

HOW TO BE INDEPENDENT
Image credit: Marriage.com

We all rely on others to some extent; there’s nothing wrong with needing. As Kids, we relied on our parents for everything. as we grew, we slowly started to venture into the world and have some personal freedom—still ultimately relying on the adults in our lives. Even in adulthood, we need other people. None of us can go through this life completely alone. However, one can go through life without being too dependent on others. In this post, you’ll learn how to be more independent, even in your relationships.

How to be Independent

Indeed, it is an attractive concept. Certainly, we all would like to say that we are independent, take charge of our own lives, and have a reason to throw our hands up in celebration of our self-sufficiency. But sometimes, that’s just not the case.

Sometimes, we find ourselves being too dependent on other people. And honestly, that’s OK. Life throws some curveballs, and we are not meant to handle everything on our own.

Being independent is vital for people who want to take more control of their lives and feel like they don’t need others to accomplish their goals. Being more independent will give you the freedom to do what you want without caring what others think.

It will also help you find some original solutions to your problems. You may even feel relief and joy as you grow in independence and start taking your life into your own hands. Here are some ways you can become independent ;

#1. Make decisions alone

So often, we crowdsource decisions we could easily make independently. Sure, it’s helpful to get someone else’s opinion every now and then, but sometimes, it just inhibits you from being confident in your own judgments. This goes for big decisions as well as seemingly insignificant ones.

#2. Focus on admiring yourself

You have special skills and a unique worldview. Say out loud to yourself that you deserve to be here just as much as anyone else. You need to hear it from yourself. Get out that notebook of yours, and write down at least ten things you love about yourself.

Ignore that voice in your head that keeps telling you it’s selfish to appreciate things about who you are. Instead, replace it with a voice that says, “I’m awesome, and here’s why!” Once you are in tune with positive qualities in yourself, you will be far more likely to want to work hard for the amazing individual you are

#3. Discover what is holding you back

Many people can find it difficult to become more independent. It can be challenging to figure out what’s holding you back from having more authority over your life. Sometimes, past experiences in life can keep you from moving forward in a way that aligns with your values and goals. There can also be other factors in your life that leave you feeling more reliant on others than you want to be.

How To Become Independent In A Relationship

A relationship comprises two people with shared hobbies, interests, and affection for one another, who create a bond greater than the sum of all those individual parts. One of the hallmarks of a successful relationship is a commitment to one another.

However, it’s also important for people in a relationship to maintain their independence–whether you’ve just started dating or been married for 30 years.

Luckily, by setting aside time for yourself, communicating boundaries, and maintaining a healthy relationship with your partner, staying independent can be easy and even make your relationship stronger. It’s very important to have independence in a relationship.

Successful, healthy relationships allow both people to form a bond that lets them grow together and independently as people. It’s essential to have your own sense of autonomy while feeling you can depend on each other.

Ways you can achieve independence in your relationship:

1. Recognize your emotions

Learning how to build a sense of self is an important part of growing as a person. You want to learn how to recognize your own emotions in situations where you need to stand up for yourself and make quick decisions when your partner isn’t available.

Good ways to do this include a daily practice of meditation.

2. Cultivate hobbies and interests apart from your partner. 

being in a relationship shouldn’t hinder you from Having hobbies so as to nurture your independence and maintain your sense of self. Take this opportunity to find something you like doing that your partner doesn’t necessarily enjoy. This way, you can affirm your independence and pursue a hobby that won’t require your partner’s sacrifice.

Beyond being a source of independence, hobbies can also greatly impact your well-being. Studies show that hobbies like painting, writing, and hiking can lower blood pressure, promote creative thinking, and foster a sense of satisfaction. Remember this when you tell your partner why independent hobbies are a good thing

3. Prioritize your goals for yourself. 

Being independent means having a self-identity that isn’t subsumed by your relationship and its impact on you. Don’t let yourself lose sight of what kind of person you want to be; you shouldn’t sacrifice your goals for yourself on the altar of your relationship.

4. Have a space you can call your own. 

If you’re living together with your partner, having a part of the home all to yourself is crucial to maintaining your independence. Set aside an area of the house where you can go to be by yourself, and your partner won’t disturb you. You should ensure your partner won’t disturb you by communicating your desire to have your own space and explaining the situation to them.

If you’re setting aside part of a shared residence as your own, be sure to put only your own stuff in the area, whether it’s a room or a corner of a room. Your independent space can also be a public place (e.g., a coffee shop or public park) where you can spend time away from your partner. Your space only needs to be private in the context of your relationship, not necessarily the rest of the world.

Also, encourage your partner to have a similar space for themselves.

5. Prioritize your goals for yourself. 

Being independent means having a self-identity that isn’t subsumed by your relationship and its impact on you. Don’t let yourself lose sight of what kind of person you want to be; you shouldn’t sacrifice your goals for yourself on the altar of your relationship.

Talking to friends and family is a good way of “checking in” on yourself every now and then to see if you’re still the kind of person you want to be.

If you ever find yourself at a point where you’re no longer happy with who you are, that may be a sign that something (maybe even the relationship) needs to change.

6. Stand up for what’s important to you

While you should be willing to compromise and make sacrifices in a relationship, you should also make sure you’re always in control of your own priorities. Be willing to stand your ground on things that matter to you, and don’t let your partner sway you away from them. This doesn’t mean you should never compromise. Rather, decide what morals or values are non-negotiable for you and be willing to reasonably compromise on everything else.

Don’t change your personality for another person. If you’re an extrovert in a relationship with an introvert, find time for them as well as other interpersonal interactions. For example, if evenly dividing the responsibilities for chores is important to you, say so in a firm but respectful way. Be willing to accommodate your partner where you can, but don’t let them sway you on things you care deeply about.

What Is an Independent Person Like

There are many types of people in the world, and highly independent people have unique characteristics.

Independent people do things that others do not and are frequently unaware of. Furthermore, they frequently learn things the hard way, which makes them stronger.

Many people are born with independence, but you can practice their habits more freely. Being decisive, having a strong will, and wanting to do things on your own are all clear signs of a highly independent person. The following are the inherent features of independent individuals

1. They have good habits

Highly independent people know that the things they do become a habit. So, they develop good habits without realising it by consistently doing beneficial things. They always seem to be developing new habits, too.

Having good habits helps people with independence and confidence. They are satisfied when they know they can do things independently.

2. They plan for the future

An independent person plans for the future instead of doing things on a whim. They view the overall picture and aren’t looking to have fun. Because of this, independent people tend to save more money, too.

3. They avoid asking for help

Independent people don’t like to ask for help because it makes them feel weak. Instead, they choose to struggle through every task to prove to themselves that they can do it.

They will avoid reaching out even when they know someone who could help. If an independent person has no other choice but to ask for help, they will feel defeated and disappointed in themselves. Even if they gave their best effort, not accomplishing things on their own is hard for them to deal with.

Skills You Need To Be Independent

1. Time management

Possibly the most important skill for young adults to master as they become increasingly independent is time management. When parenting children and teens, it’s natural to create a calendar for them and enforce appropriate times for school, sleep, appointments, and recreation. However, This implies that for most young individuals to become fully autonomous, time management is a set of skills that they must be intentionally taught.

2. Stress Management

While money, work, relationships, and prospects for the future can all cause anxiety, learning one’s own triggers and how to cope with them is a highly individualized process.

Some people find that breathing exercises or meditation help, while others find comfort in writing in a journal. Exercise, music, and spending time in nature can all be helpful, as can therapy or medication.

No matter what the solution is, both new and experienced adults need to learn how to deal with stress in a healthy way.

3. Health and self-care

This means making and keeping key medical and dental appointments, as well as developing skills like planning and preparing healthy meals, tracking and taking necessary medications, and finding a type of exercise that is engaging enough to want to do it regularly.

Self-care also means knowing how to get help when their health, whether physical, mental, or social, seems to be worsening.

How can I start living an independent life?

  • Pay your bills on time.
  • Every month, put money aside.
  • Get used to being alone.
  • Accept responsibility—and assist.
  • Create a solid budget. The most crucial principle to remember when living independently is to spend your money carefully.

What makes an independent woman?

One can consider a woman to be independent if she completely supports herself on her own and takes pride in being able to do so. A woman who is independent is aware of her emotions, speaks from the heart, and upholds her personal principles. 

Why should women be independent?

Financial independence is known to increase confidence and self-esteem. Every woman should strive to be financially independent. It improves your independence while also being beneficial to your health. 

Conclusion

I could go on and on about this topic because it is such an interesting one. I hope I was able to establish the fact that being independent should not make one completely arrogant and that they start to negate the potential of other individuals. Self-sufficiency is a level that is highly unattainable.

But, if for some reason you believe you’ve reached this point, remember to take care of others as well. Show modesty.

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