Whether it’s platonic or not, love is an immersive feeling that makes us happy even when we don’t want to admit it. A lot of people have different meanings of love. Although, it’s a general perspective that love is all about huge butterflies and heart aches, the good kind. However, this is not the case all the time. It’s way deeper and more complex. So what is love? How do you know you’re in love with someone? Let’s find out!
DESCRIBE THE FEELING OF LOVE
We have all experienced that feeling of love, for our family, our friends or even a romantic partner. So, what is love? Can you explain how it makes you feel? People believe love is an emotion, a feeling quite intense. But I don’t totally agree with that. Love is not just a feeling or what we do because of how we feel. But, love is what we do regardless of how we feel. Ok a classic example, in romantic relationships, you can easily call a quit when your partner is too much to handle. But you can’t do the same with family. Not to sound like Vin Diesel but it is what it is. It’s deeper than we can ever imagine.
TYPES OF LOVE
We have three types of love in general. They are;
#1. AGAPE LOVE:
This is the type of love that God gives.
“For God so loved the world, that he gave his Only Begotten Son, that would so ever believeth in Him shall have everlasting life.” (John 3:16)
We’re quite familiar with this verse. This is agape love as it goes.
#2. PHILA OR PLATONIC LOVE:
Generally, platonic love involves deep affection, but no sexual or romantic attractions. Platonic friendships can be anyone basically. When you love someone platonically, you’d notice some signs and attributes like:
a. Care and worry for this person.
b. Similar goals, interests, and values with this person.
c. Genuine support each other through difficulties.
Although, platonic love does not satisfy some needs as romantic love might. But it’s just as important. A lot of people believe bonds formed in friendships are stronger than any other kind of relationship.
#3. EROTIC OR SEXUAL LOVE:
Basically, this type of love revolves around sex and sexual desires. A perfectly good example; On Valentine’s Day, you’d notice that there are a lot of relationships formed because of sexual urges, one-night stands, and all that. But erotic relationships do not seem to last.
HOW TO TRULY LOVE AND UNDERSTAND YOUR PARTNER
When learning how best to love someone so you don’t overstep in all kinds of relationships, you’d have to;
#1. Communicate More:
Like I always say, communication is key. Everyone has different communication needs, but you can maintain your closeness by calling or texting. When you do talk, try to spend at least as much time listening as you do share your own thoughts.
#2. Set boundaries:
Some platonic friends may be perfectly fine spending the night at your place, hanging out at all hours, or discussing the sexual details of your other relationships. While others might want to reserve such activities for romantic partners alone. When you talk about these boundaries, it can help you avoid any form of miscommunication and misunderstandings.
#3. Spend time together:
This is very important in all relationships. Although, you might not always be together. But try to stay connected with each other, by planning online chats, FaceTime, video game sessions, or even virtual movie nights.
#4. Offer emotional support:
Even though this person always appears tough, offer them your emotional support. We all need it right? Love and friendship would work easier when it helps weather life’s challenges of everyone involved.
HOW DO YOU KNOW YOU’RE IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE
When you love someone romantically, it usually involves a desire for a many-faceted connection. That is physical, emotional, and in some cases spiritual. You value their personality and want their friendship. Love in some cases can be like a sensory overload at times and you might lust after them a little (though you can experience romantic love without ever desiring a physical relationship). Maybe you find their looks appealing, but you mostly want to spend a lot of time with them because you value them as a whole person and want to develop a lasting emotional connection.
When you’re in a relationship with someone, you should;
#1. Avoid getting swept away by lust:
When you notice you like someone, there might be a lot of mixed feelings. Are you just infatuated, are you in love, or just plain old lust? Basically, you like her curves. This is absolutely normal though. It’s ok to appreciate her. But make sure you’re working towards an emotional connection, too.
#2. Learn and grow together:
When you want to make your relationship last, it’s essential that you really get to know each other. Generally, this can involve discussing dreams and goals, sharing challenges and successes, and even trying new things. You maintain your own identities, but you also develop a shared third unit: the relationship itself.
HOW DO YOU KNOW YOU’RE IN LOVE WITH A GUY
I know this is the 21st century but ladies still live with the notion of not expressing their feelings first. First, they’d try to convince themselves that they’re not in love with the guy. But honestly, they are. So how do you know when you love a guy? Some signs that you might feel are;
#1. You catch yourself in moments of jealousy:
I guess we all know how “jelly” a lady can get. Maybe it’s when he’s talking to someone you’re just watching and wondering who she is. You start stalking his social media and when you see the same person on his social media account. Without a doubt, you’ve fallen head over heels. Especially when he is not your boyfriend. The truth is when you start getting “jelly”, it means you care for this person.
#2. You are always insta-stalking:
He’s one of the top people who come up on your newsfeed. You care about what she’s up to and everything in general. You want to check his story but you don’t want to seem too eager so you wait for a little. Or you creep a bit and the next thing you know you’re scrolling through insta looking at pics from years ago for reasons you can’t even come up with.
#3. You’re always happy to see him:
Oww, your heart just skipped a beat right. His presence is always warming to you. When you see him, your face lights up and you might not even notice. But he simply makes you happy.
#4. You miss him when he’s not around:
When you don’t see him, you get all jittery. Although, your pride might not let you say you miss him you do hope he misses you too.
#5. You think of him late at night:
Almost every lady is a dreamer. Basically, they would want to envision this perfect relationship and dream man. But when a lady is in love with you, she’d always play out conversations you guys had during the day in her head at night. As a lady, when you’re always buried in thoughts of him all the time. Then you are definitely in love with him.
HOW DO YOU KNOW YOU’RE IN LOVE WITH A GIRL
#1. You want to tell her everything:
When something good or bad happens she’s the first you want to talk to. Basically, you just want to tell her everything, the good, the bad, and the ugly. Even when it seems really minor and irrelevant you still want to talk about it. In fact, you’re looking for any reason to talk to her because she’s one of your favorite people to have conversations with.
#2. You’re growing interested in the things she likes:
Things that used to not interest you remotely suddenly do. Especially when she’s involved in this. You can even go as far as getting a new hobby. And it’s not being fake or pretending to be someone you aren’t, she’s changing you in general.
#3. She makes you nervous:
Maybe it’s those five seconds before you talk to her but you see her approaching and your heart beats a little bit faster. There is something about her that makes you a little nervous maybe it’s how much you care because you aren’t ready to admit it. Maybe it’s knowing her value but being afraid of hurting her or messing something up. Maybe it’s the way she lives her life that both scares you and inspires you. But it’s the people that scare you most that are the best.
#4. You’re kinder than usual:
Basically, you treat her better than you treat anyone else in your life. You always want her to notice these little things. In general, she makes you want to be a better man.
HOW DO YOU KNOW YOU’RE IN LOVE QUIZ
This simple test will help you know if you are in love or plainly infatuated.
1. When you spend time with this person, do you enjoy it?
2. Are you quick to compromise when you disagree on issues?
A. I let things slide
B. I don’t
3. Have you recently broken up with someone else, like within the last 1-2 years?
A. Yes (Sure he’s not a rebound, check and be sure)
4. Are you over your ex?
5. Do you have any inside jokes?
A. So many!
B. We don’t really talk enough to have any.
When all or most of your options are “A”, then you are definitely in love with this person.
Remember everyone goes through the butterfly stage when you’re in love. But take things slow ok, so you don’t regret anything you do under impulse.
What do I do when I know I'm just a rebound?
Well, it’s not always easy but you need to find someone who loves you for “you” and truly cares about you.
What is Love?
Love is a deep emotion. A deep feeling, in essence, it’s what we do regardless of how we feel.