This is a guide to helping clearly differentiate between healthy and unhealthy relationships; in other words, healthy vs unhealthy relationships.
Overview: Healthy vs Unhealthy Relationships
We have an innate craving for intimacy as human beings. Our mental and emotional health depends on our ability to develop secure, healthy connections. In fact, studies have shown that it can help us live longer.
Healthy relationships come naturally to certain people. Perhaps they grew up in an environment where their parents modelled it for them. Others, on the other hand, will have to learn it later in life. They might have to go through a few unhealthy relationships before finding (and forming) one that is.
It’s crucial to note that not all toxic relationships begin this way. Unhealthy habits can creep up on you over time. Relationships are similar to physical bodies. To keep them healthy, we must look after them. When a relationship begins to go sour, both partners may notice it in time to make amends. Sometimes, it’s too late, and you cannot walk away.
So if you’re unsure if your relationship is healthy or unhealthy, we’ve put together a list of indications to help you figure it out.
Signs: Healthy vs Unhealthy Relationships
Below are signs to help you detect if you are in a healthy or unhealthy relationship.
Signs of a Healthy Relationship
You both support each other – We all need someone to look out for us in life, and knowing that our partner will be there for us in the tough times is crucial. We all have highs and lows, and they occur at different times. Both parties in a healthy relationship will be able to provide support when it is needed (rather than just one).
You learn and grow as a couple – No one is implying that developing as an individual in a relationship is simple. And because we all develop at different rates, it may be necessary to make certain adjustments. But, because both people love each other for who they are and want to see their partner succeed, a healthy relationship allows for this flexibility.
You successfully settle conflict — “Couples who fight together stay together.” It may seem surprising, but studies reveal that couples who clash together are 10 times more likely to be happy than couples who avoid conflict.
You have each other’s trust – Trust is the bedrock of any relationship. Trusting yourself and your partner entails trusting yourself, your own judgments, and your partner’s judgments.
You communicate about difficult topics — Excellent communication is undoubtedly one of the most important skills in all elements of life, but it is especially crucial in a healthy relationship. Both partners can see and hear each other when they communicate openly.
Read Also: 15 GUIDELINES FOR UNHEALTHY RELATIONSHIPS
Outside of the relationship, you have your own lives to live — Unity should be tempered with uniqueness. A healthy relationship has a bond that allows the pair to grow together while thriving independently. Maintaining a well-rounded existence outside of your partnership benefits you and the relationship as a whole.
You can be funny with each other — Playfulness helps people connect, and who doesn’t need more laughter in their lives? Couples who are more fun in their relationship have happier, more fulfilled relationships, according to studies.
Even when sex isn’t involved, you’re touchy and physically affectionate — Physical connection is essential. Kissing, hugging, and holding hands are all bonding experiences that promote emotional intimacy and connection.
Signs That You’re In an Unhealthy Relationship
You feel guilty (often without cause) — You have the impression that you are always the one to blame and that your partner never takes responsibility when things go wrong. It’s possible that feeling guilty for no cause is a sign of emotional manipulation.
There’s a feeling of not being able to live without each other, which is a hallmark of codependency. A healthy relationship necessitates the existence of a life outside of the relationship for both partners.
Your partner does not respect your boundaries – In a relationship, boundaries are crucial since they serve as basic instructions for how you want to be treated. Setting and keeping boundaries foster a respectful and loving relationship in which you both have your needs met.
You feel as if you’ve “lost yourself” since a depleting relationship depletes your energy – If you’re starting to feel less and less like yourself around your partner, it’s an indication that the relationship is draining you.
You’re losing touch with your friends and family – Perhaps they constantly complain about how much time you spend on the phone with your sister or flatly refuse to hang out with your friends. To make you more reliant on them, a controlling partner would try to deprive you of your support system.
Lack of trust – Jealousy can be endearing at first, but it can quickly turn sour. When trust is lacking in a relationship, it can rise to paranoia and possessiveness, both of which are huge red flags.
Your partner is possessive and/or controlling – They may express this outrightly (by telling you what you can and cannot do) or in a more subtle, deceptive manner (“if you truly loved me, you’d never question me”).
You can’t talk about personal matters — In order for a relationship to be healthy, both partners must feel safe enough to open up and be vulnerable.
Read Also: What is a Healthy Relationship? Best Practices & All It Involves
You don’t feel like they’re “there” for you when it matters most — if you feel like you’re always there for your partner but they don’t – or can’t – reciprocate the same level of care, the balance is clearly off.
Your partner should be rooting for you because your self-esteem has eroded – This is a solid sign of an unhealthy relationship if you believe they belittle, demean, or invalidate you (or your accomplishments).
The relationship is physically or emotionally abusive — Leave as quickly as possible if there has been any physical abuse. Physical violence is rarely a one-time occurrence but rather the start of a deadly pattern. Emotional abuse (shouting, sweating, spiteful language, manipulation, and so on) can also leave invisible scars that are just as destructive.
Healthy vs Unhealthy Relationships Characteristics According to Experts
Relationships that are Healthy
Teens should be trained to expect certain features in healthy partnerships. They are as follows:
Respect for one another. Respect indicates that each individual values the other’s unique qualities and is aware of the other’s limitations.
Trust. Partners should have faith in one another and extend the benefit of the doubt to one another.
Honesty. Honesty strengthens a relationship by fostering trust.
Compromise. Each participant in a dating relationship does not always get their way. Each person should be open to hearing other people’s perspectives and willing to offer and take.
Individuality. Neither partner should have to compromise who he or she is, and neither should his or her identity be reliant on that of the other. Everyone should keep seeing their friends and doing the activities they enjoy. Each should encourage his or her partner to seek new interests or make new friends.
Excellent communication. To avoid miscommunication, each partner should speak honestly and openly. If one partner needs to sort out his or her feelings first, the other should respect that wish and wait until the other is ready to speak.
Controlling your rage. We all get furious, but how we display it can have an impact on our interpersonal connections. Taking a deep breath, counting to 10, or talking it out are healthy strategies for dealing with anger.
Read Also: Open Communication in Relationships & Marriages (Rules & Guide)
Fighting in a fair manner. Everyone has a disagreement at some point, but those who are fair, stay on topic, and avoid insults are more likely to find a solution. If the talk becomes too hot, partners should take a short break away from each other.
Solving problems. Breaking a difficulty down into little sections or going through the scenario with your dating partner might help you learn to solve challenges and find new solutions.
Understanding. Each spouse should take the time to consider how the other is feeling.
Self-confidence. It can strengthen dating partners’ relationships with others if they have confidence in themselves. It demonstrates that they are calm and at ease enough to enable others to voice their thoughts without imposing their own.
Taking on the role of a role model. Partners can motivate each other, friends, and family to behave respectfully by exemplifying what respect means.
Healthy sexual relationship. Dating partners have a sexual relationship that they are both comfortable with, and neither feels compelled or pushed to engage in sexual activity that is outside of his or her comfort zone or without consent.
Relationships That Aren’t Healthy
Disrespect and control are two features that characterize unhealthy relationships. It’s critical for young people to be able to spot the warning signs of toxic relationships before they get out of hand. The following are some characteristics of dysfunctional relationships:
Control. One of the dating partners makes all of the decisions and instructs the other what to do, wear, and spend time with. He or she is irrationally jealous of the other spouse and/or seeks to isolate him or her from his or her friends and family.
Hostility. One dating partner picks a dispute with the other dating partner or antagonizes them. As a result, one relationship partner’s conduct may change in order to avoid offending the other.
Dishonesty. One relationship partner deceives the other or withholds information. One of the dating partners takes advantage of the other.
Disrespect. One dating partner ridicules the other’s beliefs and hobbies or destroys anything that belongs to the other.
Dependence. One dating partner believes that the other “cannot live without.” If the relationship ends, he or she may threaten to do something catastrophic.
Intimidation. One dating partner tries to exert control over parts of the other’s life by instilling fear or timidity in the other. One dating partner may try to isolate his or her partner from friends and family, as well as threaten violence or a breakup.
The use of physical force. One of the partners uses force to acquire what he or she wants (such as hitting, slapping, grabbing, or shoving).
Sexual assault. One dating partner pushes or coerces the other into sexual activity against their will or without their consent.
What Are 5 Signs of a Unhealthy Relationship?
Five Signs of Unhealthy Relationships include;
- Dishonesty.
- Controlling behaviour.
- Avoidance.
- Insecurity.
- Co-dependency.
What Are Some Signs That a Relationship Is Unhealthy?
Some signs of a relationship that is unhealthy may include;
- Physical Abuse
- Humiliation
- Dishonesty…
Conclusion
Please pay attention to these indicators, which can help you determine the relationship you are in or about to enter, whether you are already in one or just getting started. Keep stoking the flame if the connection is healthy and beneficial. However, please do yourself a favour and leave or terminate the relationship if you find yourself in an unhealthy one.