A long-distance relationship can work; many couples who have been doing long-distance for long periods can witness that. However, you’ll need to handle a specific set of concerns, such as making time for each other, keeping emotionally connected, and maintaining that spark. So, we turned to the experts to find out what habits couples need to make a long-distance relationship work, no matter how far apart they are.
Many individuals think long-distance relationships can never work out. Your family may dissuade you from doing so, and some of your closest friends may warn you not to take it too seriously if your heart is shattered.
Nobody says it’ll be simple; the extra distance makes a lot of things impossible. Things may become complicated, and you’ll sometimes feel unhappy and lonely.
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The extra distance, on the other hand, makes the most straightforward things sweeter, such as holding each other’s hand while eating at the same table, feeling each other’s touch, taking a walk together, and smelling each other’s hair.
These seemingly insignificant requests could suddenly mean much more in making a long-distance relationship work.
Long-distance relationships can be challenging, but they can also be full of surprises. Here are 21 strategies for making your long-distance relationship work to keep your love alive and strong:
1. Excessive communication should be avoided.
Being extremely “sticky” and possessive is not a good idea. You don’t need to talk for 12 hours daily to keep your relationship going.
Many couples believe that doing more will compensate for the distance. This isn’t correct. And it may make things worse. You’d become tired of “loving” in no time.
Keep in mind that little is more. It’s not about spamming; you’ll only tire yourself that way. It’s all about teasing and tugging at the appropriate times and in the right places.
2. Look at it as a chance.
Consider it a learning experience for both of you. Consider it a test of your love for one another. “Real gold is not afraid of the test of fire,” as the Chinese proverb goes. Instead of believing that your long-distance relationship is tearing you apart, you should trust that this experience will strengthen your bond and help you make it work.
3. Establish some ground rules to keep your expectations in check.
During this long-distance relationship, you must be clear about what you expect of one other.
Set some ground rules so that neither of you will do something that will surprise the other. Are you two, for example, exclusive? Is it okay if the other person goes on dates with you?
What is your level of commitment? It’s preferable to be honest with one another about these issues.
4. Try to communicate regularly and creatively.
Greet each other “good morning” and “good night” every day—this is a must. Also, try to update your partner on your life and its happenings, however mundane some of the things may seem.
To up the game, occasionally send each other pictures, audio clips, and short videos. Putting in this kind of effort makes the other person feel loved and attended to.
5. Have some nasty talk with each other.
One of the most significant aspects of a relationship is sexual tension. Sexual desire acts as a glue that keeps both people together.
Sex is not only a biological necessity, but it is also an emotional one. Send each other tempting texts full of sexual innuendos and provocative descriptions to keep the fires burning. Sexy puns also work well.
6. Stay away from “hazardous” circumstances.
If you already know that going to the club or drinking late at night with your pals will annoy your partner, you should either 1. not do it or 2. tell him/her beforehand to reassure him/her.
Don’t be casual about this; it will just make your partner more apprehensive or suspicious and, of course, quite upset because you’re putting him or her in a position where he or she feels weak or out of control.
7. Work as a group.
Play an online game with your friends. Simultaneously, watch a documentary on YouTube or Vimeo. On Skype, sing to each other as you play the guitar. “Go for a walk together” while video-calling each other outside. Together, go online shopping and purchase each other gifts.
8. Carry on in the same manner.
Recommend books, TV series, movies, music, current events, and other items to one another.
When you read, watch, and listen to the same things, you have more common ground to discuss. This is a terrific way to establish shared experiences even if you live apart.
9. Pay each other visits.
Every long-distance relationship revolves around visits. You finally get to meet one other after all the waiting, wanting, and abstinence to fulfill all the little things like kissing, holding hands, and so on, which are all common to other couples but particularly meaningful and intimate for those in long-distance relationships. It’ll be filled with sparklers, glitter bombs, confetti, rainbows, and butterflies.
10. Set a goal for yourself.
At the end of the day, what do we want to accomplish? “How long do you think we’ll be apart?” “How do you feel about the future?” These are the questions you and your partner should be asking.
No couple can maintain a long-distance relationship indefinitely. We all have to settle down at some point.
So, develop a plan with your friends. Make a timeline, note the estimated times apart and together, and draw a finish line. You and your partner must be on the same page and share the same objectives.
So that, even if you don’t share the exact location or timezone, you’re both motivated to work together in the same direction toward a future that involves both of you.
11. Appreciate your alone time and your time with friends and family.
You are alone but not lonely unless you decide to be so. You don’t have to allow your partner’s life to revolve around him or her; you still have yourself, your friends, and your family.
Take advantage of this time to spend more time with your friends and family. Make it a habit to go to the gym regularly.
Find a new pastime, binge-watch your favorite series, or do many activities that do not require your partner’s participation.
12. Be truthful to one another.
Talk about your fears, insecurities, jealousy, indifference, and whatever else is on your mind.
If you try to keep a secret from your partner, it will eventually consume you from the inside out. Don’t try to handle everything on your own. Communicate openly and honestly with one another.
Allow your spouse to assist you and provide you with the support you require. It’s preferable to address a problem when it’s still in its early stages than to wait until it’s too late.
13. Be familiar with each other’s schedules.
Knowing when the other person is busy and when he or she is available is helpful so you can text or call at the appropriate time.
You don’t want to wake up your spouse during a class or a work meeting.
Know about the tiny and significant events in each other’s lives, such as college midterms and examinations, necessary business trips and meetings, job interviews, etc. This is especially important if you and your partner live in separate time zones.
14. Stay on top of each other’s social media activity.
On Facebook and Instagram, they like each other’s images, send each other tweets, tag one another, exchange items for each other’s walls, demonstrate their concern, and keep their talking to a minimum.
15. Give the other individual a personal item to hang on to.
A memento has a lot of power. Whether it’s a little pendant, a ring, a keychain, a collection of songs and movies, or a bottle of perfume, there’s something for everyone.
We routinely ascribe significance to little objects and stuff in our daily lives, whether consciously or unconsciously. We all do this: we try to store memories of intangible objects in the hopes of being able to look at or hold on to something that will help us recall when our minds fail us.
This is why something so basic may mean so much to someone, even if it is of little or no value to others.
16. Invest in an excellent messaging application.
This is critical because texting is your most regular and frequent mode of contact. You’ll need a solid messaging program that allows for more than text and emoticons on mobile phones.
17. Send your gift via snail mail.
Postcards and handwritten love messages are sent to each other. From time to time, they send each other gifts across the globe. Birthday, anniversary, and Valentine’s Day flower delivery. Shop together online for fashionable T-shirts, attractive undergarments, and other items.
18. Keep an optimistic attitude.
To keep a long-distance relationship alive, you must consistently infuse good energy into it.
Waiting can be challenging and lonely sometimes, but you must remind yourself that the fruits will be as delicious as heaven.
19. Stay informed about each other’s acquaintances and family.
Because the finest topics to talk about are usually gossip and scandals.
20. Whenever feasible, make a video call.
Because looking into each other’s eyes and hearing one other’s voices can bring everything back to normal.
21. Assign pet names to each other.
Because it’s adorable. It maintains a romantic atmosphere.
What Should You Not Do in a Long Distance Relationship?
Here are the seven things you should never put up with in a long-distance relationship, no matter what.
- Predictability.
- Texts using only one word.
- An Open Relationship Is Suggested.
- Flakiness in excess.
- Being Stuck in the Middle of a Debate.
- There’s a lot of jealousy in this world.
- Silence.
How Long Does a Long Distance Relationship Usually Last?
Long-distance couples break up in 40% of cases; on average, these partnerships survive only four and a half months.
Conclusion
According to Randy Schroeder, Ph. D., author of Simple Habits for Marital Happiness, long-distance relationships are complicated because you must almost entirely rely on communication to maintain your bond strong, which may necessitate more work than a normal relationship.
A strong sense of ‘oneness’ is the goal of any satisfying partnership. Long-distance couples must accept that staying connected will take more effort to avoid even minor breaches in their [relationship’s] foundation.”
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