The impact of a breakup is devastating, especially if the relationship is long-term. It leaves you in a state of extreme agony and unpleasant emotions. When someone enters your life at this point and appears to heal your emotional scars and support you, you welcome them with open arms.
But are you making the proper decision by allowing this new person into your life? Or would it result in a rekindled romance?
If you are in a similar pattern, it is beneficial to understand what a rebound relationship is, the signs and stages, and why it fails. We explain everything you need to know about these types of relationships.
What Is a Rebound Relationship?
A rebound relationship begins quickly following the end of a long-term romance, relationship, or marriage. It’s a distraction from the former relationship and a veiled desire to move on in life.
However, it could simply be an excuse to avoid pain and loneliness. Because the new relationship numbs the pain, it is simple to spend time on it rather than dealing with the anguish. To put it another way, a rebound relationship is a short fix for getting over a failed relationship.
Rebounding might feel like love because the individuals involved in it desire to be in love. They are accustomed to the solid sense of love and simply want it to continue, albeit with a different person. They deceive themselves into believing they are in love when the truth is that they miss the safety and comfort of their prior relationship. So, what are the signs of a rebound relationship?
The Signs of a Rebound Relationship
People who are in a rebound relationship do not allow themselves enough time to recuperate from their previous relationship and move on too quickly. While it is natural to feel loved and safe in a relationship, many people fail to recognize the obvious warning flags or signs of a rebound relationship.
These signs will alert you if you are in a rebound relationship:
#1. Get into a new relationship as soon as possible.
You’ve just been in a new relationship for a few weeks after breaking up. Finding and bonding with someone takes time; the longer you wait, the less likely you are to have a rebound relationship. Everyone has their own timeline for processing breakups and moving on to a new relationship.
#2. You’re open to dating anyone.
You initiate a new relationship, knowing that the person on the other end is not the real person you are seeking. However, you become attracted to them as you receive attention and care. You prefer the focus to the person.
#3. Easily fall in love.
You feel linked to your new partner, fall madly in love after only a few dates, and commit even before you know your partner. That is fairly common among rebounders.
#4. The relationship can be both rapid and slow at the same time.
Rebound partners move extremely quickly and slowly at the same time. They may engage in the relationship quickly, but there may be a disconnect.
#5. Make a point of rubbing the connection in the ex’s face.
You might wish to brag about your new love in front of your ex. You go out of your way to make sure your ex understands how happy you are in your new relationship.
#6. When you’re lonely, you need a companion; when you’re happy, you can ignore them.
The new rebound relationship is a way for them to move on from the heartbreak of their former relationship. As a result, you require a new companion to compensate for your loneliness and conveniently overlook them when you are pleased.
#7. Sex is at an all-time high.
Rebounders like sex but are unsure of where their relationship is going. They frequently engage in sex to distract themselves or to get over a breakup.
#8. Not sure of how you got over your prior relationship.
Moving forward requires time and cannot be rushed. It can take months or years. However, if you complete it in days, it may be something to consider.
#9. Demonstrate your status as a long-term couple.
Despite having only been dating for a few weeks, you and your partner act as if you have known each other for a long time.
#10. Ex-monster syndrome
You haven’t moved on from your ex; in fact, you haven’t allowed yourself to go on. If you exhibit any of the following symptoms, you most certainly have the syndrome:
- To reduce pain, vent your resentment toward your ex and utilize your new spouse as a sounding board.
- Talk a lot about your ex, and keep your affection for them hidden.
- Spend time hoping that your ex will contact you again.
- Using social media to communicate with your ex.
- Spend time with your ex’s buddies.
There is nothing wrong with meeting a new individual and beginning a new chapter in our lives. However, before you begin a new relationship, make certain that you have entirely cut your connection with your ex. Now that we have seen the signs of a rebound relationship let’s look at the different stages.
The Different Stages of a Rebound Relationship
A rebound relationship, like any other, goes through numerous stages. Let’s have a look at what they are:
Stage 1 – Find the right person.
The causes of your previous breakup are the foundation for your current partnership. You are prone to find a companion who is opposed to your ex and thus feels vindicated.
The fact that your new spouse is not your ex may lead you to believe that you have met the right spouse. This assumption may be too flimsy to support your partnership in the long run.
Stage 2 – A honeymoon period.
Everything is going great now that you’ve discovered the “right one.” You have the impression that everything is going swimmingly as your new companion pays you attention and you warm up to them.
This stage in a rebound relationship feels natural, but you have no idea where it is leading you. You keep comparing your ex to the new lover, and you believe this is the perfect choice for you. There will be times when you distrust your partner, but you will brush such doubts under the rug. These minor variances could quickly escalate into a major problem.
Stage 3 – The breakdown stage.
The minor disagreements and misunderstandings that arose during the honeymoon period resurface, and your relationship begins to deteriorate. You argue yet refuse to end the rebound relationship because you don’t want to be alone again. Instead of talking about your feelings, you conceal them, which causes them to explode sooner rather than later.
Stage 4 – The explosion stage.
All of your hidden emotions build up and explode. The grounds for your previous split also seem to apply to your new relationship.
The bad news is that your new partner is unaware of the reason for your behavior because they have come to believe that everything is fine between you two.
Stage 5 – The final stage.
You know that a new relationship is not the answer to a broken heart. You recognize that to start a new relationship; you must be open in your communication and demand the same from your partner.
If your new partner is prepared to compromise, you may give the relationship another shot. And, if you’ve ended the rebound relationship at this stage, you’ll have more time to reflect this time.
Reasons Why People Seek a Rebound Relationship
Being in a rebound relationship can be disappointing, and discovering that someone you care about is rebounding with you can be devastating. However, your partner may be unintentionally rebounding, and your relationship is not necessarily doomed.
There are a variety of reasons why people seek rebound relationships. Sometimes, they wish to improve their self-esteem or get over someone they love.
Common reasons why people seek rebound relationships include:
- To get over an ex: Starting a new relationship might help people find closure over their ex-partner.
- To form an emotional connection: Someone may seek out a new relationship to satisfy their need for an emotional connection. When done in a proactive manner, this can be healthy and even healing.
- To make their ex jealous: Many people start new relationships and flaunt their new partner around in order to make their ex jealous.
- To fill a void: Many people with anxious attachment or low self-esteem struggle to be alone. To prevent this painful feeling, they may seek out a new partner immediately.
- To prove to themselves that their recent breakup was not their fault: A person may seek a rebound relationship if they are worried about how they appear to others. Perhaps they are embarrassed or worried that they will look bad to mutual friends and family after the breakup.
Negative Features of a Rebound Relationship
No one actually gets into a rebound relationship expecting this one will last. People who participate in rebounds are well aware of what they are getting themselves into. They are not actually questioning, “Am I in a rebound relationship?” they are rather stating, “I am in one.”
From one-night encounters to one-month or 6-month stands, these relationships affect both the rebounding individual and the new person in the relationship. Unless you have been over a split after a love alliance and are convinced of establishing a new relationship, adverse dynamics are tremendously at play. Some bad features of being in a rebound relationship are:
- You come into the relationship feeling weak, vulnerable, and unsure.
- Being vulnerable increases your chances of being manipulated and exploited.
- There is an approaching risk of narcissism and sexual exploitation.
- You may also be apprehensive about trusting the new relationship and battling the persistent fear of rejection.
- Instead of addressing underlying concerns, you seek short-term, transitory fixes.
With such issues involved with the new relationship, it could be tough to continue long.
How Long Do Rebound Relationships Last?
It is impossible to anticipate how long your rebound relationship will last. You may recognize your error within a week of starting the relationship, or it may take a few months to realize you no longer desire it.
What is predictable, though, are the numerous stages your rebound relationship may go through before it fails.
What Do Rebound Relationships Fail?
The most obvious reason is your hasty entry into a new relationship. Here are some additional reasons why rebound relationships fail:
- Healing after a breakup takes time and cannot be accomplished overnight. Rebounders bring emotional baggage to their new relationship, which causes tension.
- They are in the relationship for the wrong reasons, such as making their ex jealous, having sex, or avoiding loneliness. Any relationship that is devoid of love and trust is doomed to fail.
- They will not be successful if they move from one relationship to the next without learning from the prior one.
- A rebound relationship is not founded on genuine love. And any relationship founded on incorrect notions is doomed to fail in the long term.
- In a rebound relationship, the rebounders anticipate the new person to fix all of their issues, make them feel complete, and make them forget the pain of the breakup. This places a lot of strain on the spouse.
- A rebound relationship serves as a diversion. When that purpose is fulfilled, the relationship fades.
It should be noted that not all new relationships (after a split) are rebound relationships. You will almost certainly find the ideal mate. There is a good possibility that you made the proper choice when selecting your new companion.
In addition, if you make some intentional attempts, your relationship will last a long time.
How Can You Keep A New Relationship Going?
Here are a few things you should be aware of:
#1. Make an informed decision.
Don’t let your emotions take over; don’t start yearning for a new person in your life. Making friends and getting to know people is an excellent place to start. Take your time evaluating your potential partner, writing down what you like and dislike about them, weighing your options, and making a sound selection.
#2. Heal yourself following a breakup.
When you are in pain, it is impossible to make sound decisions. Your anguish will compel you to be hasty, resulting in more suffering than satisfaction. Allow yourself time to recover from the split by spending time with friends and family, taking a break from work, and taking a vacation. This will give you some breathing room to recoup and reflect.
#3. Recognize that you are in a rebound relationship.
If you’ve already started a new relationship and the chink has begun to show, don’t be in a hurry to get out of it. Give it some time to see what you like and don’t like about it. Try to modify the things you dislike. Who knows, your efforts may bear fruit, and the rebound relationship may turn out to be a long-term one.
Remember that your new relationship does not have to be a rebound relationship, especially if you have moved on before the official breakup.
After a breakup, having someone to console and love you is good. However, you must allow yourself some time to heal. Accept the heartbreak, ponder on what went wrong, and allow time to heal you.
Do you have any thoughts on rebound relationships? Please leave your thoughts in the comments section below.
What to Do If You Are in a Rebound Relationship?
If you’re in a rebound relationship, take a slow, deep breath. You may blame yourself for the circumstance, but you most likely could not avoid or change the relationship. You cannot make someone ready for commitment, and you do not deserve a partner who does not love you.
Here are a few pointers on how to deal with a rebound relationship.
- Trust yourself: You can tell when you’re experiencing true love and care. Do not let a rebounding partner convince you otherwise.
- Focus on what you can and cannot change: Remember that being a rebounder is not your fault. You cannot change the person, so concentrate on moving forward and finding a partner who appreciates you (if you are ready).
- Practice self-care: focus on your own needs. What will you do to recover from this situation? Turn to activities that give you joy and satisfaction.
- End the relationship: Consider ending the relationship if your partner is not satisfying your needs. A rebound situation can be positive, but only if you are comfortable with the relationship’s boundaries.
- Lean on your support network: Seek support from your friends and family. They can provide much-needed support during difficult times.
- Get back out there: Don’t let a bad experience discourage you from dating. Many decent folks are waiting–just watch out for the rebounders!
Can Rebound Relationships Lead To Long-Term Relationships?
A person who is still hung up on their ex is unlikely to be a successful long-term partner. However, if the person is open about their feelings and honest about their desire to move forward, a rebound relationship may be healthy and long-lasting.
Are Rebound Relationships Ever Successful?
According to new research, rebound relationships are remarkably healthy when done correctly. Taking time to move on between relationships isn’t necessary for emotional stability.
Why Is Rebounding Bad for You?
A rebound that is better than your previous relationship may sever that connection. It literally changes your brain’s neurological pathways and re-teaches it to feel good without your ex around – which means you have to feel good around your rebound.