WHAT TO LOOK FOR IN A RELATIONSHIP: 13+ Things to Keep an Eye Out For

what to look for in a relationship

Healthy relationships require honesty, trust, respect, and open communication from both partners, and they necessitate effort and compromise on all sides. There is no power disparity. Partners respect each other’s independence, are free to make their own judgments without fear of retribution or retaliation and make decisions together. However, recognizing when a relationship is going well is equally crucial. Many people are unclear of what to look for, or worse, they are unaware of all the benefits that they genuinely deserve in a relationship.

With that in mind, here’s where to begin. These characteristics are found in healthy, functional relationships and are more prevalent in committed love relationships. They should not be considered optional. And when they go missing, it’s critical to address the issue.

#1. Trust

Trust is perhaps one of the most critical aspects to look for in a relationship. Without trust, there is no firm foundation on which to create emotional closeness, and your propensity for being injured – repeatedly – grows. Without trust, you’ll be always unsure if you can rely on your partner to come through for you and whether they truly mean what they say. There are numerous methods to create and repair trust in a relationship, but if you are not on the path to doing so, your relationship is extremely sensitive to stress and uncertainty.

#2. Interaction

Communicating honestly and respectfully, especially when dealing with difficult issues, is something that does not come naturally to everyone. We may have learned to keep negative feelings hidden for the sake of harmony or the illusion of perfection, or we may have never learned how to admit tough feelings to ourselves at all.

Other difficulties include expanding a quarrel into a full-fledged war: a lack of ability not to take things personally or lashing out when we feel threatened.

It’s acceptable if you have these tendencies; what matters is that you work on them because strong and healthy communication is the lifeblood that keeps successful relationships alive.

#3. Patience

No one can be completely patient all of the time, and things such as a lack of sleep, stress, or physical health issues will make you more easily annoyed at different stages in your life – it’s part of being human. Partners in a healthy, loving relationship, on the other hand, provide each other a basic common denominator of patience, which allows for calm, flexibility, and support when one person is having a poor day or is not at their best.

When partners are chronically impatient with each other, they often create a dynamic of bean-counting and resentment in which they mentally tally the “offenses” committed by the other partner. Being able to adjust to the ebbs and flows of a partner’s moods in daily life — within reason — can instead allow for a sense of being unconditionally loved.

#4. Compassion

Being open to considering another person’s point of view is beneficial in a variety of situations, including parenting, being a good neighbor, and even simply allowing someone to merge in front of you on the highway. However, it is arguably most crucial when it comes to the person you’ve selected as a partner. Can you honestly attempt to comprehend their point of view, even if you disagree with it? Is their suffering motivating you to strive to make them feel better? Do you rejoice over their victories? Long-term love necessitates empathy.

#5. Attachment and Interest

Love should be a part of any healthy, committed romantic relationship — in fact, I didn’t bother putting it on the main list. More delicate than love, however, is the expression of that love in the shape of tenderness as well as genuine interest — a liking for each other. Small physical expressions of affection, such as hugs, kisses, and reassuring touch, can go a long way toward keeping each person in their relationship feeling comforted and secure.

A relationship has no “correct” amount of physical affection – as long as both partners are happy with how their needs are met. The same can be said about physical intimacy. When it comes to the “like” component, it indicates that you are actually interested in and fond of each other and that you are together out of attraction (even if it is no longer the physical infatuation of the early days) rather than necessity.


#6. Adaptability

You’ve probably heard it before: relationships necessitate compromise. And, while some factors exclude an ideal scenario (you can’t choose to have half a child, for example), the crucial component that makes for a healthy compromise is essential no matter what: adaptability.

It’s critical for both partners to be flexible in their day-to-day lives and decision-making since if one person is always bending, the imbalance can become toxic over time. Both partners in a healthy relationship are willing to adjust as needed to the changes and growth — both positive and negative — that may occur over a long-term relationship. And they can analyze what matters most to each person in the relationship and how that should be addressed on a common level, especially amid difficulties. Two partners who are unwilling to bend to fulfil the other’s needs will soon be on different paths – a far distance from actually sharing a life together.

#7. Appreciation

The evidence on the role of appreciation in relationships is significant; it makes us feel happier and safer with our partners. And the more we feel grateful, the more we feel loved for who we are in relationships, which promotes the relationship’s well-being. Even simple acts of thanks and appreciation can boost relationship pleasure. So, the next time you think it’s pointless to say “thank you” for something your partner has done, reconsider. Consider the bad sensations that all of us have when we perceive a decline in appreciation over time.

#8. Potential for Expansion

Relationships get stale not because of the passage of time but because people feel stuck and unable to evolve, either as individuals or as a pair. Expecting two people to remain the same across months, years, and decades of a relationship is unreasonable — and downright destructive. Hopes, concerns, aspirations, and hobbies change all the time, which is positive.

A relationship does not have to terminate or suffer as a result of this, as long as both individuals give each other room to grow by not pigeonholing each other into their younger selves, by trying to discover what’s important to the other person, and by not setting rigid expectations.

#9. Respect

We frequently identify the concept of respect with persons or concepts that are not intimately related to one another: honouring one’s elders, respecting religious symbols, or respecting authority. Respect, on the other hand, is just as crucial, if not more so, in a tight partnership. People in healthy relationships talk to one another in ways that do not debase, invalidate, or disparage each other.

They respect one other’s time and ideas just as much as they respect their own. They respect each other’s privacy and don’t utilize each other as a punchline for jokes or as hired help to clean up the flat or make a thankless supper. When respect begins to dissolve in a relationship, rebuilding it takes time and effort – the damage is far simpler to cause than undo.

#10. Mutuality

The calculating that early relationships reveal (“He picked me up at the airport last week, thus I owe him a favor”) fades into the background in healthy relationships as a new, trusting equilibrium takes its place – you both just usually do for each other when needed. In an ideal circumstance, the give and take are nearly equal throughout time, and neither spouse feels resentful.

Of fact, in many relationships, the give-and-take will never equalize (e.g., one partner needs long-term medical care, is naturally a more happily nurturing person, or struggles with a psychological disorder). And that’s fine as long as both parties are content with the level of give-and-take that exists, and they each find a way to contribute to the relationship and their partners — particularly in the form of emotional support — when they can.

#11. Healthy Dispute Resolution

Much study has shown that the way a couple argues — or does not argue — can predict a lot about the success of their relationship. In American culture, we tend to view romance through rose-coloured glasses. We are ready to accept tension at the beginning (the boy-meets-girl, boy-loses-girl, then boy-gets-girl-back-and-lives-happily-ever-after trope prevalent in so many popular films, for example), but once a couple rides off into the sunset together, we expect everything to be well from then on.

Ironically, couples who hide their disagreements with one another in order to maintain the illusion that everything is fine are likely to be considerably worse off than couples who communicate their feelings and seek to resolve them as they arise, even if it generates conflict. In brief, whether there is a difference of opinion or an issue, healthy relationships avoid stonewalling and escalating into personal attacks. They may discuss it with respect, sensitivity, and understanding.

#12. Boundaries and Individuality

After a while, two people who were precisely the same would presumably not have much to talk about; after all, they’d already know the other person’s point of view, so why bother listening to it? Of course, two people who are so different that they don’t share each other’s values or daily ways of life are certain to have too little in common to keep an interest in each other (at best) or be downright incompatible, disliking one other from the start (at worst).

The sweet spot to look out for in a relationship in which similarities serve as a foundation for connecting with one another, but individual differences are accepted and valued. Furthermore, it is critical that each spouse will have their own life, particularly in terms of friendships, professional ambitions, and hobbies. A strong, healthy relationship is similar to a Venn diagram in that there is enough overlap to keep the connection strong, but each person has aspects of their lives that are theirs alone, and that boundary is respected by both parties.

#13. Transparency and Honesty

Different partners have varying levels of openness in their relationships; for example, some may be horrified at leaving the bathroom door open, whereas others will discuss the most intimate of physical details with each other without hesitation.

The same is true for being open about one’s ambitions, dreams, and even the specifics of one’s workday. But, no matter where you land on the spectrum of letting it all hangout, it’s critical that there’s a solid fit — and that whatever disclosures you do make are honest.

Partners who conceal their genuine selves, conceal their inner realities, or purposefully deceive their partners about their habits and behaviors endanger the essential foundation of trust that any relationship requires.

What exactly should you Look for in a Relationship?

The truth is that no one else can tell you what to look for in a relationship since only you have all of the answers you seek.

However, if you are trying to look for a decent starting point that will increase your chances of a successful relationship and a happily ever after, start with these characteristics.

Finding someone to spend time with is difficult, but that doesn’t mean you should settle for anyone. You must remember what to look for in a relationship with someone with whom you may grow. As long as you have all the required characteristics rather than desired, your relationship can flourish and endure a lifetime!

What to Look for in a Relationship FAQ’s

Where Do Most Guys Meet Their Girlfriends?

Going on dates is still the most typical way to meet a lover, girlfriend, or partner. According to Compare the Market, 27% of couples meet in social gatherings such as parties, pubs, or nights out. So, don’t be scared to put yourself out there and strike up a conversation with someone fresh.

Is It Okay to Be Single Forever?

It’s perfectly OK! However, if you remain single out of personal preference, be sure you’re doing so for health reasons rather than fear or insecurity. If you don’t want to be single but are already doing so and are concerned that you will never find someone, don’t despair!

Is It OK to Talk to Your Girlfriend Every Day?

Your Relationship May Be Hurt If You Talk To Your Partner Every Day… It may feel fantastic to talk to the person you’re dating every day when you first start dating them. You want to stay connected to validate your affection for each other, swept away by fresh feelings and the newness of the relationship.

How Do I Keep Her Interested?

Respecting her is crucial to keeping her interest. Show her that you value her opinion and make sure that she puts in her two cents when it comes to your decisions together. Let her talk without interrupting, listen to, and never insult or belittle her.

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